master mariner, lord of lies

we need an american girl doll that plotted the downfall of her former boss by making him look like a coke addict

sits on my own blog like it’s the edge of a lake wistfully

skips a stone over a few posts

I told a guy his total was 13.21 and he said “wish it were that year, could actually get some good music on the radio”

breaking news from the AP, our boys on the front have just sacked constantinople. take that, heretics. coming up next are the soothing lute dirges of bing crosby

I hate you shipping discourse I hate you unnecessarily aggressive DNI banners I hate you dehumanization of those you disagree with I hate you harassment over ships or favorite characters I hate you purposeful lack of nuance I hate you false equivalencies I hate you policing how people engage in fandom I hate you actively trying to make fandom spaces hostile I hate you refusal to filter your feed I hate you making it everyone else’s problem

makes them kiss like barbie dolls :)

saying this as a lesbian who loves women's boobs--sexually, even! but i don't think that we as a society should consider breasts inherently female or inherently sexual. a flat chest should not be seen as the "default" for gender neutrality but instead just one way a person can present. boobs should be normal. anyone of any gender can have boobs

boobs are kind of what our taxonomic category is known for. we even named it after boobs. That's what Mammal means. It means "having boobs". Fun fact humans might have the most 3d boobs because we have flat faces with noses that point down.

Jane Austen was really out there 200 years ago writing lines like “If I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more” that to this day are still so swoon-worthy.

I have this theory that the more defensive an animal is around their home, the tastier their offspring must be. I came up with this theory two summers ago when my friend and I accidentally stepped on a yellow jacket nest and they proceeded to sting us so incredibly painfully and stalk us to try to finish the job. We barely made it out alive! Since yellow jackets don’t actually make anything tasty like honey, I concluded that there must be something even tastier worth protecting; their offspring. Yellowjacket larvae must be so incredibly delicious and tender that they must not only deliver a powerful sting, but hunt down any trespassers to death. Anyway, I don’t have any evidence for this theory yet but I’m hoping to try it out soon by acquiring a beekeeper costume and grabbing a yellow jacket grub to see what it tastes like

i've been phasing the phrase 'google it' out of my vocabulary and going back to 'look it up'. fuck you youve lost your generic trademark privileges