I am trying

i like working at plant store. sometimes you ring up someone and there's a slug on their plant and so you're like "Oh haha you've got a friend there let me get that for you" and you put the slug on your hand for safekeeping but then its really busy and you dont have time to take the slug outside before the next customer in line so you just have a slug chilling on your hand for 15 minutes. really makes you feel at peace with nature. also it means sometimes i get to say my favorite line which is "would you like this free slug with your purchase"

"ccute baby bunny compilation" "cutest rabbit videos!" "cute bunny so sweet every video" NO. i want FUNNY rabbit. i want rabbit STUPID compilatiom. I want every video of a rabbit thumping over some inane thing . i want a compilation of ever rabbit thats ever jumped in a trash bin. show me the goddamn animal

You shouldn’t date or become serious friends/partners with someone if you can’t stomach the thought of being stuck in a car or train with them for 16 hours.

*pulls European closer* The most populous countries in the world are China, India, the United States, Indonesia, Pakistan, Nigeria, and Brazil in that order, with these seven nations alone making up 48.16% of the world population. You may note with the aid of a map that many of these nations are quite large, and would take several days of travel to go across either in cars or on boats. Almost half of the world's population lives in places where you can travel in a cramped vehicle for days and still be within the country. Your worldview is limited and Europe is a tiny outlier in travel time and standards for international relations.

the fairy on my windshield as i go down i95 at 210km/h

you forgor!!!!!! HIS PENITS!!!

"if tumblr dies you can find me on bluesky" "if tumblr dies you can find me on Instagram" if tumblr dies you cannot find me. It's over. I'm free.

RAISIN POWERED FUCK MACHINE

LOVER OF THE RUSSIAN QUEEN