this is gospel;

“I thought you loved me.”

“I do! That’s why I can’t just kill you.”

“I, Lydia Chandler, am begging you to murder the love of your life at the mention of the NYU acceptance.”

“Nope, I must refuse. I can’t do that.”

“There is one condition. If my cousin Maci brings up, more than twice, her acceptance to NYU, you have to hold me underwater until I stop struggling.”

“Are you, Lydia Chandler, asking me to murder the love of my life simply at the mention of a NYU acceptance?”

“Would you like to come to my family party, Liam?”

“Why darling I thought you would never ask.”

“Saturday And it’s an actual terrible time. Unless you like grown people trying to out perfect each other.”

“We both know I do.”

“You’d do great in Texas. We’ll get you some boots and a big belt buckle. My dad’s brother and sister are coming into town and I’d rather drown than play ‘let me tell you what my amazing kid is doing’.”

“Oh yeah? When are they coming? I love family gatherings.”

“I got an A in all three years of Spanish I’ve taken so far, let’s go somewhere down south. Like Texas.”

“Don’t know if I would do too well in Texas, babe. So, why is it that we’re leaving?”

“Wanna run away together? I turn eighteen soon, we can run off, get married, leave Lima forever. I do need to do it before this weekend though.”

@liamxalvarez

“A splended plan if I ever heard one. Where are we running away to?”

“You really, really should have.”

“I know. It’s my own fault, really.”

“Embarrassingly enough, I tripped.”

“Okay that does sound pretty embarrassing, not going to lie.”

“Of course, How can I earn my future title of man eater if I don’t?”

“Should have known you would use me eventually.”

“Then I’ll fix you, Sweet Liam. Or move on and break another guy, I haven’t decided yet.”

“I see how it is. Keeping me hanging on.”

“You’re adorable.”

“You intend to just insult me, Chandler? You know, it normally turns me on, but eventually you’re gonna break me.”

“Wait, what man are we talking about?”

“Me, I’m the man.”

“I’ll have to write it out for you again. So how many of these thirsty guys have you appeased so far?”

“Again, you wound me. I have appeased none of them. Now, some of the ladies well - a man has his needs.”

“You forgot that I am also your moon and stars.”

“Ah yes, how could I possibly forget?”

“Oh, no nevermind, nothing learned. I’ve been Not All Men’d.”

“Lydia Chandler, love of my life, apple of my eyes, queen of my heart, you wound me.”