out to live a tale worth telling.

Excuse me, sir, put down my bloomers!

I thought “bee suit” meant like a bee costume until I read the word beekeeping

wearing shorts with a hoodie is such a gay and dumbass move. like are you hot or cold bitch???

its cute

is pepsi ok

‘i guess’ i said sulking, my amber hued orbs peering down because of gravity

‘ok.’ i hand you seven large cokes and a pepsi

Are you shitting me?

proof that humans have peaked as a species

I just noticed the little ears on their hat

today i had a man tell me, in all earnest, that i obviously wasn’t very good at my classical studies degree because zeus only had one son, hercules - his source was the disney movie hercules

#it would be easier to list the sons zeus does not have

The lack of context here is thrilling

*picks up dog’s left paw* no wedding ring? interesting