hello pals

she's hades she's god she's jesus christ she's mary magdalene she's the grim reaper she's the virgin mother she's judas she's eve she's pontius pilate she's all four horsemen of the apocalypse she's the earth herself. her name is eva stratt and she listens to harry styles and she got taken to court for pirating minesweeper.

I think eva stratt has detailed files on all petrova taskforce personnel that contain more information about their subjects than the subjects even know about themselves. several people in her employ have mild food allergies that she noted and had cut out of their diets via requests to the catering staff but that the people themselves have never consciously noticed, ilyukhina just thought she stopped getting regular stomach aches when she arrived on the vat because she's god's specialest engineer and not because all the dairy in her diet got swapped out for alternatives. grace does some shopping on the mainland at one point and doesn't realize he bought a different scent of moisturizer than usual so stratt just goes into his room and switches it with a hypoallergenic formula in an identical bottle. this is because she has never been normal about anything in her life.

its terrible for any number of reasons, but i think if we invent immortality there should be an extreme sport called civilizational speedrunning where teams of 20 go into the wilderness somewhere and try and be the fastest build the first internal combustion engine. i bet you could get it down to like 3 years tops

The real trick is to eat seed heavy food before the speedrun starts so your first poops are halfway to agriculture already

i want you on my team holy shit

WHY are all my friends SCATTERED ACROSS THE WORLD and not IN MY HOUSE for a SLEEPOVER

Dude. I Reread my nrmt oviposition fic. I was horny HORNY writing that I guess what the hell

it's that time again, kids

THE FIA NOTED HIM FOR THIS IF HE GETS FUCKING PENALISED FOR THROWING HIS HEADREST THAT FAR SJSJJDSLKDHDOE