ain't that just the luckiest thing?

Something I really enjoy about Halsha as a ship in Campaign 4 is that they are a really good and nuanced depiction of a type of polyamorous relationship often referred to in the community as "comet partners." Comet partners do not live together, and spend time together only occasionally. Like a comet passing by the sun, they are bound by gravity and a shared orbit, but the comet comes close to the sun only intermittently.

My read of Halsha is that they never "broke up" in the traditional monogamy sense of the word, but rather transitioned from being nesting partners (partners who live together) to comet partners, and remained as comet partners even as Hal shacked up with a new nesting partner (Elodie) and subsequently ended that relationship. In my many ways, this is an even harder thing to do than "breaking up" in the traditional sense. When you break up, the relationship is over. When you change from nesting partners to comet partners, you have to completely rewrite the terms and norms of your relationship, while trying to preserve the core of what you love about your relationship in the first place. It's even more complicated when you're co-parents, and you have to rewrite the terms of your relationships to the kids as well.

There is a saying in the polyamorous community: "Love is infinite, but time is not." This leads to interesting dynamics between comet partners. What I've noticed from my own experience (I have two comet partners) is that there is an incentive to focus only on the positive when you're together. You don't get to see each other much, so you just want to spend the precious time you have reveling in the joy of being together again. There is a temptation to push aside and ignore any problems in your relationship, because you don't want to ruin your precious short time together, and besides, it can be easier to live with problems in your relationship when you don't have them in your face every single day.

I see this exact dynamic at play with Hal and Thaisha.

Whenever they reunite, they are so joyful and so thrilled. It's really touching to see. At the same time, their relationship has subtle problems that they are choosing to put to the side, both because of All the Shit Happening and because they just want to enjoy each other while they can.

One of the issues that I see between them that they have chosen not to address is that they label their relationship, or conceptualize their relationship, in different ways. In episode 27, the Photarch says to Hal, "I understand, Mr. Fang, that you have brought a woman that I know to be actually your love, yes?"

Watch this moment. It's a little awkward.

Thaisha just smiles broadly and nods. Meanwhile, Hal grimaces awkwardly and says, "We're family, yes."

I'm not sure exactly what's going on in Hal's head here, but it seems to me that either a) he prefers the label "family" to "love" for the relationship between him and Thaisha, and he feels awkward that Thaisha is not on the same page as him about that; or b) he would like there to be one label for what they are in private, and a different label for what they are as far as the broader world and the Sundered Houses are concerned, and he's chagrined that the public image of their relationship is not what he wants people like Yanessa to perceive, while Thaisha is unconcerned about this. Either way, this is something that the two of them ought to communicate about, but they haven't.

The other clear issue that lies between them is that Hal's mental health has severely declined since Thjazi's death, but he has kept this issue firmly under wraps in Thaisha's presence. Hal has been hiding things from Shadia and Hero (e.g., sending Shadia off to go live with Elodie without explaining why), even as Shadia and Hero get increasingly involved with Schemer business, which Thaisha has a right to know about as a co-parent in the polycule. He's also had some awful and worrying episodes with regards to his mental health while she was out of the city, such as his whole PTSD nightmare experience in the sewers, and his angry crashout over Thjazi in episode 24, and he hasn't talked to her about any of these negative feelings or problems, even though they are severe. Throughout the convergence, in front of her, he's just been the visionary artist, the burgeoning revolutionary, the proud dad, and the starry-eyed lover, not the scarred veteran or the grieving brother.

July 11, 2023 and July 11, 2026 3 years of Calliope 🩵