im in your pocket

an ice cold beer topped with a scoop of vanilla ice cream. lying on top of the ice cream foam is a salted peanut. this is the angel. around him are sprinkles (his tears). this is "the angel's lament", my new cocktail

other drivers will see your safe distance from the vehicle in front of you and go "is for me? 🥺" and then proceed to not use their turn signal before swerving into your lane

im only a level three imagination haver sorry i wouldnt get it

as a level five imagination haver i can only imagine how hard that is for you

rub it in why don't you

Oh my god I realized what gives me the ick about jellyroll it's like slightly tweaked secular CCM music of a very specific flavor and my body reacts to that in ways that are entirely subconscious

i need people to know that warlock girl went on to win that season of America’s Next Top Model by like a significant margin

im happy they worked it out

I heard too many sounds at once and now I am a bitch

i thought i could keep it together but i lost it at “let’s go to pride, son” 

I too lost it at that part

Same here

Hey OP, change your name.