perish

guys. guys I just had a fucking vision of the next tumblr meme

[I.D. Two drawings of Garfield. The first is sitting down like a normal cat, as he used to be portrayed in the comics. The second, he is standing on two legs like a human and points to himself with a red glint in his eye. Text above and below reads “Become Bipedal.” End I.D.]

call off the meme now please

This post is what, hours old? Are y'all going for some kind of shitpost speedrun? Cuz i’m totally here for that

Pokemon Heritage Post, apparently

is the world really such a terrible place? yesterday i asked if oat milk was extra and the barista said yes so i said ok just regular milk then and when she gave me my chai latte she whispered “i used oat milk ;)” doesnt that make u want to live another day?

here is my life philosophy: next week there might be someone ahead of you in line at the store who’s short a quarter and you have a quarter and you can give it to them. if you weren’t there, they’d have to put something back. the week after that you could be getting lunch and the waiter might ask if you want some pancakes someone else ordered and never picked up. you could find someone’s lost cat. you could watch someone’s bag while they go to the restroom. there are so many ways you are going to touch other people’s lives and they are going to touch yours and there’s no way to know when it’s going to happen. so you have to keep living!!! i wouldn’t want to die knowing that tomorrow the barista will give me free oat milk just to be nice. 

important hurdle crossed relationship wise w my boyfriend today was i finally realized what is tiring for me might be someone else’s meat pumpkin and that i dont have to worry about him not relaxing the same way i do because we are simply different people. and that is okay

blessed be the establishments that safeguard the 99¢ arizona iced tea. a thousand financial calamities on those misers who would foul the sacrosanct will of the mucho mango with an upcharge.

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ive binged like ~14 hours of resident evil lore videos over the past few days and i feel like im on the verge of some kind of severe mental break scenario

That’s real lore by the way.  Except for the part of Leon being in New Mexico.

yeah sorry my mistake. he fought the bat people in nevada

Resident Evil heritage post

Fan fiction is when a copywritten property is used as the basis for an unofficial written work by someone without license; specially for communal enjoyment. That is fanfic. Shakespeare is not fanfic because he was not writing off copywritten properties he was basing his works off common tales or historical events. Biopic are non fanfic because they are licensed/based on historical figures not fictional tales. If I wrote a new age cinderella story it would not be fanfic because I am working off the folk tale. The 2015 cinderella live action is not fanfic because it WAS licensed. The Bible and Greek mythology are not fanfic because they are Religious Texts. None of this is hard to understand