i'm having awkward silences with god!

but above all, one must not concern oneself with the opinions of people who censor the word fuck

great. a chivalric order has started nesting under my porch & theres no way i can afford a warlock to come clear it out so i guess now ive got to deal with men-at-arms swearing oaths of valor right outside my window at 4 am every morning

puts my uncomfortably wet hand on your shoulder. see here, gay boy- can i call you gay boy?

they hit the fucking drawfeegon

im not a girl Unless ☝️ im being told to go piss

[ID: text, reads “He made a noise that was technically a response but linguistically useless.” end ID]

Over the Garden Wall has done irreparable damage to my vocabulary because I now say "Ain't that just the way" in response to basically everything

month starting on a monday we have no excuse guys lets get to work and lock the fuck in

yk its actually very chic and avant garde to start on tuesday the second

many claim theres nothing more subversive and revolutionary than starting on wednesday the third

there are simply no words in the english language that can describe starting on thursday the fourth. thats how iconic it is

choosing to start on friday the fifth. i just think its very inspiring

lets all kill ourselves