Shout out to my mom who explains my transition as "Having a daughterpillar turn into a Boyterfly". It doesn't erase the fact I was an adorable little girl, and also affirms my gender now. I love my mother.

“no one is asking for open borders” i am actually

it is impossible to watch a movie. every night i think i want to watch a movie. no movie gets watched. because it's not possible

im completely addicted to Open Link in New Tab

if Open Link in New Tab is wrong then baby i dont want to be right

sorry I can’t hang out tonight. yeah I’m busy freaking out over things that might not even happen. yeah it’s gonna take a while

This is killing me

This is what it’s all about. Saturday night. At home. Switching between the same 4 apps on my phone. Getting scared.

I have GOT to stop spending $30

if you vote me for president i vow to make everything the ocean again. no more land only ocean. this will solve all of our problems and replace them with new, far more interesting problems

when you see your little kitty walking toward you at a leisurely pace and say "hi baby!" bc you're excited to see her and she starts trotting a little bit faster 'cause she's excited to see you too. that's what life is all about i think

you don’t realize how important lunch is until you’re wandering around thinking about how unloveable and untalented and uniquely cursed you are and then it’s 4pm and you finally eat lunch and you go Oh. oh right.

lot of people commenting on this post like "who eats lunch at 4pm that's a terrible time to eat lunch" yes. that is the point. 4pm lunch is inadvisable. 4pm lunch is not the ideal. 4pm lunch makes the mind demons real.

learning that 5 minute crafts is a russian mafia operation wasn't on my 2026 bingo card but also doesn't really surprise me

have you guys heard about the greenland shark. some crazy shit happening there.