Waste Your Youth, Count Your Years, Lose Yourself

they got married btw

Handing the Google executive currently chained in my basement a piece of paper that reads "Shall I end your torture?" with one checkbox that reads "No" and another that reads "Maybe later."

Birds are basically the dinosaurs that managed to “nooo you wouldn’t hurt a cute little baby guy on his birthday” their way out of a mass extinction

For a city to be walkable. It must also be sittable.

Wile E. Coyote, two milliseconds before he lights a match only to reveal he's surrounded by flammable traps he himself has set and the whole website explodes

Naps are a forbidden technique, I think. If you pull them off just right you'll access a pool of near-endless rejuvenating power, but if you mess up some inscrutable part of the ritual your vitality and might will be sapped and you'll be left at the mercy of your opponents

no but im so tired of how self-deprecation is always more accepted than self-advocacy. if i say i can't drive because im autistic i get questioned on how exactly that works and given a million suggestions on how to do it anyway and i look like im trying to be special so it's easier to just say im a loser. yeah i don't drive because im kind of a loser lmao. oh well. and people say lmao back and we move on. at worst they say "oh im sure you'll figure it out haha." but no interrogation!! being a loser is more respectable than being disabled. being a loser is something that doesn't make other people feel uncomfortable about their own biases. so no, no im not disabled. i don't struggle to keep friends and do the laundry and make quick trivial decisions and clean my room and brush my teeth because im autistic. it's because im a loser. it's my fault. it is what it is. at least im funny now. do you think im funny? please think im funny

“be gay do crime! but sex is yucky and crime is wrong!” ass website

“you win some you lose some” Well At This Point I’d Like For Us To Start Winning Some

Gay culture is wishing you could go all the way back and be yourself from the beginning

Yo, I really dont think straight people understand that a lot of us were robbed 15-20 years of our lives if you’re lucky and didn’t commit suicide or stay in the closet untik you were in your 30’s, 40’s or later.