whenthe clarinet does th. clarinet thing *you receive a psychic blast of klezmer music so intense you start bleeding from the eyes*

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@jewish-shitposting
whenthe clarinet does th. clarinet thing *you receive a psychic blast of klezmer music so intense you start bleeding from the eyes*

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We need more Yiddish loan words, they just have a certain, jew nais se quois
It's Yiddish Wednesday!!!
You can celebrate by talking about or in Yiddish!
ā« ×××, ×××
Tried to make latkes for the first time but i fucked up and made some kind of ridiculous Goy Monstrosity

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No it's not libel if it's true
Uhm what!?!?
Can Zionists stop taking things like blood libel that are actually antisemitic and twisting them to fit their own narrative.
If there is evidence of Israelis killing Palestinian children, and there is an overwhelming amount of evidence, then it is NOT blood libel. That's not what blood libel means.
"our deli is being protested just for being jewish!"
>looks inside
fundraised for the IOF
ftr i'm literally referring to the 2nd avenue deli (nyc) and also nearly every time i see an annoying post in one of the kosher restaurant groups lmao. there are def cases of people just wrongly assuming kosher restaurants fundraise for the iof and protesting them. or protesting them because someone was once a settler in palestine as like a child and then moved away. but this deli literally just two posts posts apart on their fb page has fundraising for u.s. and iof soldiers and "we're being protested just for being jewish"
huh!
Interesting 'Immigration Menorah'. Happy Hanukkah!
A tired Jew is riding the train, when he notices another Jew on the train, reading anti-Jewish goyish newspaper. He walks up to this Jew and asks "why would you read that? They hate us!" so the one reading the paper replies "Hate us? this is the only news source that gives me any joy! in our own communities all anyone ever talks about is the pogroms and anti-semitism and how we're constantly oppressed. It's so negative! I read this because these are the only papers with any positivity. They are constantly saying how good we have it! We're rich and we control the world! I'd rather control the world."
This is a joke from the USSR, I really wanted to share it.
Reminds me of how Japan heard German propaganda about Jews and decided to appoint more Jews to high positions in order to learn how Japan could also control the world
It was called the Fugu Plan (in english, not sure what the name in Japanese was)
WHAT ā ļøā ļøā ļøā ļøā ļø
Yeah Japan really didn't get the point of the Protocols of the Elders of Zion. Also this was the time when they were trying to conquer Asia (and doing their own fair share of war crimes).
The plan was scuppered by 1942 and lost all chance of getting off the ground thanks to a little something called Pearl Harbor. (Which is fortunate for the Jews in question, because I don't know what would happen when the Japanese eventually discovered that no, Jews don't control the world after all)
(Which, yes, would inevitably happen, because I don't know how the average Jewish person recruited for this plan is supposed to fake nonexistent know-how on nonexistent world domination in the long run).
wait hello??? this is not talked about enough this is hilarious
Something similar also happened rather recently in South Korea. There was a poll to determine the levels of antisemitism in Asian countries and South Korea placed the highest in the poll in terms of antisemitic beliefs (Jews Control Media, Control Banks, etc) but it turned out that the South Korean population thought those things were positive traits š
Anyways most Jewish people who go to Asia say that South Korea is the most welcoming place theyāve ever been and a ton of Koreans own copies of a translated Talmud??
CW: antisemitism, pale of settlement, pogroms, genocide, cultural erasure
I don't think goyim can really conceive of how much Jews actually hold back in our criticism of antisemitism in media, and when you hear us it is often because we see a dangerous message that you don't... Yet.
I have a complicated relationship with Tim Burton's rendition of The Corpse Bride. I love it as a beautiful piece of stop motion art, but it isn't what it should have been, he took a Jewish story from the Pale and with intention stripped it of its Jewish origins. This alone is incredibly antisemitic. The criticism you will hear has probably been "this is a Jewish story, it should have retained its Jewish elements" but have you heard why we feel strongly about this story?
The story of the corpse bride is incredibly important to me and was born from Jewish trauma and Christian violence. Mobs would routinely attack Jewish weddings, they would murder brides and they would bury them in unmarked graves by the roadside still in their wedding clothes, they reasoned that without Jewish wives there are no Jewish mother's. Jews are intrinsic to the story.
It is antisemitism to take our story, about our pain, at the hands of non-jews and strip it for "useful" parts, in fact it is heartbreaking every time.
We are often forced to pick our battles and fighting a battle over a movie that has already been released by a director with a cult following is not worth it, you only hear us speak up in numbers when the antisemitism may lead to another century of violence, because raising our voice means picking a fight, because so many of you already see our pain as inconvenient and it is exhausting to never be heard.
-anyone can reblog

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in honor of purim i finally remembered to retrieve my hamentaschen alignment chart from my work computer
i get why people are skeptical of claims about ārising antisemitismā in a world where a genocidal state is claiming everyone standing up to them is being antisemitic, but the reality is that the average person actually genuinely is being more antisemitic. every comment section on every single post i saw about Holocaust Remembrance Day was like this
israelās actions ARE causing a rise in antisemitism in the average gentile, because they push the narrative of representing jewish people as a whole, which would make us all culpable for their horrific actions. and even the people who arenāt being antisemitic themselves are certainly more okay with the people around them being antisemitic. it's likely someone you know or are close with believes in some sort of conspiracy about jews running the world or having all the money or controlling the media etc etc. not zionists, not israelis, jews. israel wants jews to believe that everyone hates us and theyāre the only safe place for us to exist. as a diaspora jew whose family fled the shoah this is not fucking true and itās insulting to say that it is, but being a gentile saying this shit only helps israelās cause because it's what they want us to believe. they want the world to hate jews. donāt fucking fall for it. judaism is not zionism and zionism is not judaism.
to be fair, this is kind of exactly why people are skeptical ā institutions like the ADL and similar groups that produce these statistics are deeply zionist and are counting anyone speaking out for palestine in these hate crime statistics. itās important to acknowledge that both of these things are true; that zionist groups are coopting the idea of antisemitism to suit their needs (making the word feel as though it means nothing!) AND that actual antisemitism ā that is, hatred towards judaism and any jewish people, holocaust denialism, saying that we ādeservedā the shoah or that āhitler was rightā, that kind of thing ā are all happening more and more in increasingly public spaces
Since itās Holocaust Remembrance Day, Iām gonna circulate this site again.
Illuminate is a Holocaust remembrance and education initiative. Please take time to #RememberOne victim and join our global community.
I remember first discovering this site five or six years ago and they havenāt even cracked a million names yet. I think itās a really wonderful memorial that emphasizes each name as an individual rather than just a statistic and doubles as a teaching moment to show the sheer devastation to the global Jewish community and emphasize exactly how large a number six million is.
Frania Pasalska. She was born in 1927 and was killed at 16 years old.
āHow can you be Black and Jewish?ā
I know itās a question thatās on peopleās minds a lot, and I know that the polite, educated answer is something along the lines of,Ā āJews are a multiethnic, multicultural, multiracial people. We come in all colors, speak all kinds of languages, live all over the world. So, of course there are Black Jews.ā
Thatās what I say when I wanna get my point across without scaring white people.
But sometimes, what I really wanna say is,Ā āDo you have any idea how Black Jewish people are? Do you have any idea how Jewish Black people are? Far more confusing to me than my Black ass showing up in a synagogue is how anybody can know anything about Black and Jewish history, languages and cultures and come away thinking that Jews have more in common with white folks than they do with Black folks.ā
(This aināt the post for some hotep nonsense about the original Jews being Black and all theĀ āwhiteā Jews we see in the media being recent converts and fakes. Start your own post if you wanna be on that.)
I can hear you thinking it now,Ā āEshu, I love you, but what the fuck are you talking about?ā
Iām talking about that feeling of familiarity when I experience the call-and-response element of Jewish prayer. How we donāt just say the words, but make music with them and dance to them. Shit, allĀ thatās missing for it to be a service at a Black church is a couple of women shouting,Ā āHallelujah!ā and fainting in the aisle. I canāt even say that because Iām sure that happens on a weekly basis in some ultra-Orthodox services, and the ones doing it are men.
Iām talking about how Hebrew, our sacred tongue, is an Afro-Asiatic language and how the Levant is smack dab between Africa and Asia. How the Tanakh mentions Egypt, Nubia and Ethiopia how many times.Ā Iām talking about how we put our own spin on the languages of the places weāve been forced to live in and created rich, colorful dialects and languages of our own like AAVE, Ladino, Judeo-Arabic and Yiddish.
Iām talking about how the oral tradition manifests in Jewish and African cultures, both in our homeland and in the diaspora. Iām talking about the way we tell stories not as a dry recollections of events, but as a form of self-expression that is equal parts history, theater, stand-up comedy and philosophy. Iām talking about the way we argue, the back-and-forth where we get so into it we slamming our hands on the table and stomping our feet and taking off our shirts, but we still love each other at the end of the day. Iām talking about turning a good insult into an art form. Iām talking about how much we value communication and dialogue. How giving somebody the silent treatment can be worse than cussing them out.
Iām talking about how thereās always food whenever we get together, and I donāt mean water and crackers. If we aināt fasting, we gonna eat. Iām talking about, āWho made the kugel?ā being the Ashkenazi equivalent of,Ā āWho made theĀ ātato salad?ā
Iām talking about how we relate to our families not as people we live with who have the same last name as us, but as critical components our identity. How Mama or Ima is another name for God, the creative and sustaining force who inspires love, awe and terror. How family donāt just mean mom, dad and kids but grandparents, great-grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins and neighbors. How we got that grandma or that aunt who stay all up in our business even though we grown but we wonāt tell āem off because thatās just disrespectful. Iām talking about how we can say Pookie aināt shit and Shlomo know better than to act like that, but people outside our family better not open their mouth.
Iām talking about how centuries of oppression has developed a keen sense of humor about ourselves and the dominant cultures weāre forced to live in. Iām talking about how centuries of being blamed and persecuted for shit that people made up about us has inured us to the slings and arrows of misfortune.
āHow can you be Jewish and Black?ā
Shiiiiiit, how can you notĀ be?

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Bizbun holiday special
people with cultural/religious diets: do you follow the rules of that diet in video games? (assume the game has enough food variation to follow most of the rules)
yes, even if it inconveniences or kills me
yes, but i might break the rules to stay alive
yes, but only loosely/when i have the resources for it
sometimes, if i feel like it
sometimes, mostly as a challenge to myself
no, it would interfere with my gameplay too much/it's too much effort to do that
no, but i've never thought to try that until now
no, it would just feel performative and weird
only when it's funny
it's complicated/nuance (say in tags)
no cultural or religious dietary restrictions button/see results