jessers

You’re not depressed. You just need $250,000 in your bank account.

Reblog to materialize $250,000 in prev's bank account

Did you know: the Bluetooth wireless technology was named after tenth century Danish king Harald "Bluetooth" Gormsson (Haraldr Blátǫnn Gormsson in Old Norse) owing to his ability to transmit information over short distances by using UHF radio waves?

Hi, native dane here and this information just isn't correct. Harald Blåtand was actually able to transmit radio waves over great distances and with impressive force, which is how he came to unify the country, as described on his famous memorial runestone 'Jellinge-stenen'. The modern bluetooth technology is but a pale imitation of our ancient king's psionic powers.

I'm truly sorry for having passed on misinformation. I'm trying to learn from my mistakes. Readers, reblog this version of the post instead to quell the tide of misinformation!

you would think, like, "oh, we've already thought of all the metaphorical ways we can say penis/vagina. we've already come up with the full list of nicknames. we have exhausted the list of innuendos. there is nothing else new to be said about this" and then you'll open a random explicit fic and make the most improbable linguistic discovery of all time

would you like to share with the class 🤔

saw the term "gummy walls" last night and had to sit alone with god for a minute

would you like to unshare with the class

a billionaire can never be held accountable, therefore a billionaire must never make a management decision

i have a suggestion

forcefemming the billionaires won't help

sorry I thought you were someone else

hey itll be okay. blorbo covered in blood

*logs onto tumblr* I wonder what the people who don't leave the house are saying about sex today

he smoked one of those cigarettes for each letter he figured out

I saw a post where someone said they unfollowed me out of rage because I reblogged a horse photo where the caption misidentified the colour of the horse, and honestly, yeah, I get it. deserved.