I was listening to Noah Kahan’s Orbiter while drafting this, by the way. It fuels my mind with so many thoughts and made me mention names more than one; and besides Mayla, thanks to Noah, really.
So to officially start, Mayla (Jomillah) and I used to be in different circles before for a whole lot of reasons, but here is one of them: I used to be so competitive before during my grade school, and I often had competitions related to mathematics, spelling bees, science, and English of sorts. Also, I remember we joined together on the CDRDMO workshop bound to be done for one week; I learned a lot during the course of it, by the way. But to sum it up, most of the competitions I have had were spelling bees. Now, I really often compete with their school, and ang perception ko oftentimes sa school nila at mga students na nag-aaral sa school na 'yon ay mga spoiled brats and think themselves so highly amongst others.
And Mayla is infamous for being a rich kid no'ng nag-high school na kami. Yes, we shared the same school no'ng JHS ko, and yes, I confirmed she was kinda spoiled as she looks no'ng seventh grader na ako. I am not born in abundance far beyond what Mama and Papa can afford. We are just a simple family full of principles, at hindi pinapairal sa pamilya namin ang vocabulary namin regarding kapritso at mga bagay na hindi naman kinakailangan. Naturally, my stare lingers at her and her friends kapag nagagawi o napapadaan sa classroom namin noon, because they seem to really love announcing their presence in many ways they can. They cannot go unnoticed, I swear. I also find her so pretty and clean before based on how she dressed, on how she posted her pictures online, on how she comments on things posted online, on how she expresses herself mapa-online man 'yan or face-to-face, and on how people would love to gossip about who’s got her or her friends’ attention recently. She was that well-known.
At noong eight grader na ako, we happened to be in the same class. Tapos medyo nagkaroon na kami ng interactions. For example, kapag regarding group seatworks or there were times, about the band, LANY. Yep, as a matter of fact, mas nacurious ako about that band when Mayla mentioned them too often before. She used to really, really love them. We shared the same taste in music, somehow. And no'ng ninth-grader na ako, we were on the same section again—a pilot/star section where intellectuals would actually compete blatantly. Mind you, 'di pa uso ang artificial intelligence sa amin noon, at matalino talaga si Mayla; she used to join campus journalism kasi magaling siya magcompose ng essays and such. Of all my sections no'ng high school years, 9th grade was the best among them.
We began to hang out well ni Mayla, within campus parameters only. Mayroon siyang main circle of friends talaga, and so do I; I have my beloved Petra (Gelaica Faith) and Lez (Marlez) (I always miss them nowadays, by the way). Now, no'ng ninth grade ko rin naranasang magrebelde kina Mama at Papa without them knowing a thing about it. It was so fun! Pumunta kami ng Sealord to swim right after we secured our school/student clearance, which was used by our class adviser to certify that we have no pending liabilities, just like unreturned library books, unpaid laboratory fees, or missing school property. It was also those days na talagang nagkaroon ako ng intense crush over one of Mayla’s distant friends and also the best friend of Mayla’s crush—that soccer player who is infamous for having their brotherhood, Shawn. God, he has a GF already, and forgive me if I ever mentioned his name here. I swear, it was nostalgia that I only felt right now and nothing else anyone might think about beyond that. So haha, back to Mayla.
When we had a particular performance task to be completed in groups for the subject MAPEH, we agreed to do the taping and video recording sa bahay namin because the view is just perfect for our theme. That was fun; I enjoyed it while it lasted. We were so noisy at those times. Grabe, lala! And when we were in 10th grade, malas at nagkaroon ng COVID-19. We had to shift to modular classes in the midst of the semester. Yes, modular, since mostly sa amin noon ay wala namang access to internet and don’t possess mobile phones capable of video calls and chats. We did great, kaso 'di ko ramdam ang human connection since that year. Wala na kami masyadong bonding nina Mayla and friends. Dude, it was crazy and boring to think that even our moving up was done online (live on the Facebook page of our school).
Well, I did deliver an introductory and congratulatory speech during that day, while I was already in Manila. Yes, since I really wanted to have a proper and high-quality education, my sister gave me the idea to push through the upcoming senior high years and even college years at the metro, where I can choose and find schools that offer scholarships while also capable of delivering quality education. I was scared to death kasi magta-travel ako on my own for the very first time. Yet, I did it scared, because knowing that Ate Jane had to book a travel agent to communicate with me from time to time and for me to depart safely sa metro gave me additional courage to also act my part at my best—kasi that’s what my sister has been always doing. She is one of my pillars of strength. She might not realize it, but she helped me a lot in her ways, even makes my life a little easier when, in fact, it should be tough. Also, it was all thanks to her that I graduated and got a full-fledged merit scholarship in STI College Ortigas-Cainta. Imagine if Ate Jane did not open up the idea of going to the metro? Imagine the opportunity I would have missed!
So, I went home no'ng birthday ata ni Mama. Yeah, ‘twas bandang July 2023? Pardon my poor retention of dates. I invited Mayla, Tiptip (Stephanie Gloria), Chong (Andrew), Marlez, and Pitpit to come over so we could bond before I left for Manila again; that was just a short semestral break for me, so I had to savor that break while I still got it. I remember, we went mountain climbing sa harap ng bahay tsaka doon malapit sa bahay ng Tita namin where they built a kubo that was perfect to have a full 360-degree view of Sitio Balabag and to view Mount Canlaon so perfectly during sunsets. We did a little chitchat and siesta sa bahay. Ang gaan talaga sa pakiramdam when you are home, and that includes people that make it cozier than it is supposed to be. I remember, umuwi rin kaagad sila by the afternoon kasi 'di sila pinayagan mag-sleepover, but Lez and Pitpit were otherwise; sa amin sila natulog. I think for 2 days ata na sa bahay sila nag-stay? I really, really miss them.
So, no'ng almost patapos na ako ng senior years, close pa rin kami ni Mayla despite the distance because the internet made it possible. She used to open up at mag-vent sa akin kahit anong oras noon. She had episodes of panic attacks—well, even no'ng eighth grader pa lang kami—pero I guess when the pandemic started, the anxiety and depression were well-prevailed, and with that, we often struggle to be vocal of how we feel and talk about depression and mental health openly. The stigma about it is worse than one could imagine. But I remained in touch with Mayla kasi kahit wala man ako physically to comfort her, at least I made it known to her na I am one chat away. She can vent to me anytime and however she wants. Her problems were a bit of everything that goes around boys our age, her other friends backstabbing her or her other friends, much of it is also about school stuff and her parents. All of them were too personal.
At noong nag-college na kami, I second-guessed her career at talagang totohanin na similar kami ng program: BS in Nursing. Well, I cannot shrug off the idea when I knew her mom got her bachelor's degree in health-allied, specifically, midwifery. Up until recently, we still exchange messages, and more of them were encircling about the program we are under now and how hard it has been. Well, I tell you, if nursing is easy, maraming magpu-pursue nito. And when the pandemic started, nagiging overrated and naging in-demand ang program na 'to—not because the shift to online classes has made it easier for us future nurses to graduate sa program na ito, but because future registered nurses are so in-demand across the globe. Na kahit malapit ka nang mamatay, kakailanganin at kakailanganin ka pa rin as one of the healthcare frontliners. It may sound absurd, but I was just stating facts.
I got so engrossed with this blog entry that it got me almost 3 hours to finish, pero it actually just started when I thought about Mayla’s message for me sa IG—no, it was just a post from someone she happened to stumble upon and shared to me. It read: “Just remember when I get ultra mega stupid rich you’re on my spoil list.”
I appreciated that she thought of me still, and I replied exactly, “goals na to na may, i’d do the same btw. hahahaha.” Because for sure, I would never ever forget her. We may not have gotten closer than close and we may not have enough memories to tell kapag tatanda na kami, pero she is one of the people I can identify that matters to me, and part of me will always find her name familiar and remembered. I love that woman, and I wish nothing but a good life ahead of her.
