just saw a pigeon doing the puffed up courtship dance thing to another pigeon, and as he was strutting around he suddenly stopped for a split second to do a very brief preen-peck at his own side, then returned to the strutting around. and i surprised myself by instantly losing respect for the male pigeon in that moment, like come on man i appreciate you had an itch or whatever but how is she supposed to feel special when you're getting distracted by bullshit like that? which on reflection i don't endorse, i mean those are pretty harsh dating norms i'm imposing on these pigeons, from a total outsider perspective, for no reason. probably not all girl pigeons are as uptight about that sort of thing as i would apparently be if i was a girl pigeon, maybe she even found it endearing who knows, i don't know her. it's none of my business really. sorry pigeons.
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my mom just had a 7cm brain tumor removed and since she's woken up she's been talking nonstop about this dream she had about going to an art gallery full of colourful paintings by a 'homosexual artist' named klimsdorf who was ethereal and wise, both young and old... at first she was convinced he was a real person but after failing to find him online she's accepted he was a figment of her subconscious mind and is now determined to bring him to life via painting his portrait herself. she's 67 and has never drawn in her life. and now this. blorbo from her tumor
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Finding out AI companies are chewing through - literally, theyâre pulping and burning them as they go - millions of books often including 1/1s and old texts that cannot be reprinted
Meanwhile thereâs always some dipshit telling me AI is the future and weâve got to just let companies erase human history and literature so they can train their abomination machines to pretend to think like people because a judge said itâs fine
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When he's trying to keep his composure, but you've got him backed against the wall, and now your body is pressed against his and he's not even really hearing what you're saying because his heart's pounding in his head and all the blood's rushed between his thighs, and the look you're giving him is a mix between a pout and desperation and if he kisses you he's going to fold you in half and if he would just LISTEN for a second he'd know that's what you're angling for.
the taste of wine and honey // donquixote doflamingo x afab!reader
cw: afab!reader [no pronouns used]; pet names 'pet' and 'little bird' used for reader; alcohol use [doflamingo]; oral sex, fingering [reader receiving]; doflamingo is his own content warningâ˘ď¸
wc: 1.8k
The smell of him hits you before the sound of him doesâthe unmistakable vapors of cut-rate wine. Itâs the kind Doflamingo typically eschews for more extravagant fare, the kind he dumps onto the floor when itâs erroneously served to him with dinner, pausing to sneer before pitching the glass across the room to cacophonous laughter from his group of sycophants. No, he only drinks cheap-wine when heâs melancholy, when some unspoken horror grips him in the middle of the night and slowly wrings him out all day like a damp washcloth.
âWhat are you doing out here, little bird?â His voice is a quiet raspâno trace of malice, no condescension, none of the qualities that usually linger in between his words and trail off his tongue. Itâs only a question, a simple questionâŚfor now.
You glance up from your book to see him leaning in the doorway, bending at the waist to peer out onto the balcony at you.
âJust reading,â you shrug, waving the novel at him and using your thumb to keep your page. âWhere have you been all day?â
He takes a long swig from the bottle, red liquid dripping down his chin. âI had meetings.â
Your eyes drift down from his glistening lips, down to his white shirt that hangs open, your gaze settling on the dark purple wine stains that mix with oxidizing blood spray. One of his meetings must not have gone according to plan.
Doflamingo seems to take notice of your concerned glances and sets the bottle of wine down on the concrete, stripping his shirt off and tossing it to the side as he steps onto the balcony. The early evening sun, in its orange and fuchsia hues, highlights the tensile beauty of his musculature, your eyes drawn to the bunching muscles of his shoulders and the corrugated leanness of his abdomen. His jaw is tight and the shadows dance on sharp cheekbones and an even sharper nose. He is a striking tragic figure, magnificent in his melancholy.
He saunters forward towards the balcony railing and pauses there, staring out at the setting sun, his hands hanging at his side, one fist gripping the neck of the wine bottle with such shaking force that you brace yourself for the inevitable pop of glass shattering all over the balcony. Instead, he simply looks at you from behind crimson lenses, his eyebrows relaxed, mouth fixed in some approximation of a pout. He takes a final swig, the last few drops landing on his outstretched tongue, before he whips the bottle off the terrace and you hear the faint tinkling of glass on the ground below.
Doflamingo pauses and turns, his large hand gripping the doorframe as he heads inside. âCome in here, pet. Your king is lonely.â
The low, measured tone of his voice was at least somewhat reassuring; heâs in a mood, but one that doesnât seem to pose any threat to youânot yet, anyway. You inhale unsteadily and set your bookmark in your novel, pushing your chair back, when you hear him grumble from inside the bedroom, âAnd take that cheap thing off while youâre at it.â
âCheap?â You scrunch your nose at him as you fiddle with the tie of the soft pink robe that moves over your form like liquid. âYou told me this was the finest silk in all of Dressrosa.â
âItâs not nice enough for you,â he mumbles as he sits on the edge of the bed, carefully removing his loafers. âIâll buy you something better. Something like you deserve.â
âOh, is that right?â you tease as you stand before him, slowly letting the robe slip down your shoulders. âAnd what does your little pet deserve?â
He cackles softly as he extends his arms out wide and tilts his head backwards. âWhyâonly the world, my dear.â
A satisfied smirk works its way up your mouth as you walk up to him, slotting yourself in between his spread legs, as he grabs you and yanks you against him. You reach up and carefully remove his sunglasses; he flinches every time, no matter how gentle you are, no matter how lovingly you touch him, no matter whether you tell him youâre going to do it or not. The frames settle on the bedside table with a soft clack, as you reach up and place your hands on his shouldersâeven sitting, he overwhelms you.
Doflamingoâs large, warm hands settle on the small of your back, and he leans down, pressing his forehead against yours. You slide your hands up the sinew of his shoulders, feeling the tendons in his neck twitching with your soft movements; your fingers lightly trace along the lines of his jaw, and a soft puff of air leaves his lips, the smell of that cheap wine still lingering on his breath.
âYou okay, baby?â you whisper as your hands move to the back of his neck, fingers starting to card through his blonde hair.
âDonât âbabyâ me,â he mutters, his words beginning to slur. âYou make it sound like Iâm some pathetic thing that needs your pity.â
He slides one hand up to your face, his palm engulfing you, as he captures your lips with a ravenous urgency, as though he has something to prove to youâthat heâs not weak, not deserving of your condescension or scorn. He is the King of Dressrosa, the Heavenly Demon, a god manifested on earth.
As he pulls away from your kiss, shining threads of saliva connecting you like his strings, he flits his eyes over your face. âDonât make that face, you look dreadful.â
âYou taste dreadful,â you grouse exaggeratedly in response, wiping at your lips. âThat wine is so acidic.â
A momentary flash of viciousness lights up his eyes, fading just as quickly as it appeared, as though your possible fates quickly ran before his eyes. âIs that so, little bird?â
You pause, chewing on your lip as you analyze him, deciding how far youâre willing to push your luck today. âItâs bitter. I donât like it.â
âI see.â He moves to stand and you back up, his towering height frighteningly apparent. Doflamingo  bends down to you, picks you up by the waist with a frightening ease and sets you on the edge of the bed. He kneels before you, grasps you by the ankles and slowly, achingly, kisses up the length of one leg, then the other, before setting them upon his broad shoulders. âLay backâlet me get that taste out of my mouth.â
He splays his hand between your breasts and presses you back onto the plush bedspread as he licks a slow, greedy stripe up your slit. The low whine that falls from your lips is all the encouragement he needs to devour you, and he begins to lap at your cunt voraciously, no patience for careful licks or gentle kissesâhe wants to consume you.
His long tongue pistons in and out of your dripping hole, his thumb moving to press against your swollen clit; you squirm against, the assault of sensations both overwhelming and intoxicating, but Doflamingo only grasps you harder, his fingertips sinking into your soft flesh, presses his face more eagerly against you and moans wantonly against your cunt. Your hips buck of their own accord and you thrust against his face, and he pauses, pulling himself away from you long enough to offer you a smug grin, his mouth glistening with your juices.
âYouâre so needy, sweetheart,â he coos, a low chuckle rumbling in his chest.
You want to respond, spit out some biting little quip about how he is just as needy, how he clearly craves the taste of you on his tongue just as badly as you crave the warmth of his deceitful mouth, how charming it is that the king humbles himself to worship between your thighs. But the words never come, only strangled sounds of pleasure, guttural cries and aching whines, as his mouth eagerly finds your cunt once again, and he makes circles over your clit with the firm tip of his tongue.
Your fingers fumble to grip the sheets, your back arching up with every jolt of pleasure that runs through your limbs, every quiver of your muscles as the tension coils and coils inside you. Doflamingo groans long and low as he feels you tensing, knows he has you just on the precipice of pleasure, so close to the edge that it wonât be long before youâre pleading and begging, jumbled words of want and need tumbling from your trembling lips.
But he wonât make you debase yourself, not this time at least, and he slides two of his long, slender fingers inside your cunt, curling them upwards to stroke that most sensitive spot inside you as he sucks and laps at your clit. At once, air is forced from your lungs as you convulse into a chain of delicious spasms, crying out with unabashed abandon as your body is wracked with warm waves of pleasure. Doflamingo lets out a satisfied groan as you ride out your orgasm on him, your hips rolling against his sinful mouth, cunt fluttering around his fingers as they stroke your walls.
Itâs only when the quivering begins to subside that he pulls himself away from you and grins, making a show of licking your slick off his lips, sucking every drop of you off his fingers as rivulets run down his tanned forearms. He stands, towering over the bed, and through bleary, tear-filled eyes you take him inâa marble-sculpted figure of a god that grants you paradise, only requiring your utter, unending devotion in return. A fair bargain, you think as you try to slow your erratic breathing.
Doflamingo leans over you, caging you in on either side with steely arms, and reclaims your mouth with a fierce and urgent kiss, his long tongue sweeping against yours, almost choking you, and you taste yourself on him, with only the faintest notes of acrid, low-priced wine left lingering. He bites at your ear and neck, teeth just grazing your pulse point before soothes your skin with gentle kisses.
âWell?â he murmurs against your collarbone. âIs the taste gone now?â
You sigh and press your lips to his temple, deciding to push your luck. âI think I still taste it a littleâŚâ
Doflamingo moves with a frightening quickness and grasps your wrists, pinning your arms above your head. He cocks his head and stares down at you for a good long while, long enough to make your heart race and ice-cold dread run through your veins. At last, a predatory grin creeps up the corners of his mouth before he frees your arms and starts to lower himself between your thighs again. âThen I suppose Iâll have to be much, much more thorough this time.â
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