2018 is the year of listening to good music, eating healthier, becoming a better person, working on our insecurities and self esteem and fucking with the right people.

not idly do the leaves of lorien cut a bitch

When you don’t pay Tom Nook back soon enough

I’m crying this is so good, quality content right here

@itsworththefalll @ilovejin-youlovejin-jinlovesjin

@whysocereus @ilovejin-youlovejin-jinlovesjin I LOVE BENNY, SUCH A GOOD CAT

good idea: marry a blacksmith so you can get free swords whenever 

Better idea; become a miner and then marry a blacksmith so he can have the required materials for you to get free swords whenever. 

Make a harem and marry a full production chain

Monopolygamy.

I mean, if your harem is full of blacksmiths would that make it a polyhammerous relationship?

You could make a whole polyarmory

Sometimes I’m just sitting here minding my own business and then I remember that Thor specifically entrusted Loki with placing Surtur’s crown on the fire to initiate Ragnarok and I tear up a little bit because that’s how you love and support your chaotic neutral sibling. 

Thor: I know what’ll cheer you up. :) Loki: What’s that? Thor: You wanna trigger the apocalypse with me for the good of Asgard? Loki: !!!!!!!!

Is that not what happened? 

Not every day has to “count.” Some days, your purpose is to make it to the next one. That counts too.

Damn I needed this today.

Me too, thank you.

Mom told me once, “Always do your best. And always remember that some days your best is going to be just showing up. And that’s okay.”

anyone else have a heart thats too soft….. a marshmallow heart…… tempur-pedic mattress heart…. a cotton candy heart…..

THANK YOU FOR DOING THE LORD’S WORK AND LEAKING THIS TO US. 

day 1348 the birds still think I am one of them

I’ll bet they took every puffin and covered it up with a porg.

no but that’s literally why porgs exist

I worked with toddlers and pre schoolers for three years. Sometimes I accidentally slip and tell a friend to say bye to an inanimate object (“say bye bus!”) & occasionally they unthinkingly just do it.

I’m glad there’s a teacher version of “accidentally called teacher ‘mom’”

when I worked at Medieval Times occasionally I would slip in real life and call people “my lord”

One time during family prayer, dad began: “our father who art in heaven, American Airlines, how can I help you?”

Yesterday I went to Wendy’s and the girl said “Welcome to McDonalds” and then just sighed