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@itscaptainhammertime

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Elephant Hawk Moth
Has There Ever Been A Better Combination Than Cats & Glass Tables.
Omg I took the Covid vaccine and now my dick looks bigger?? Anybody else experience this?
I'm a healthcare worker and getting the vaccine gave me D cups
my ass is huge after the second dose
Easier than submitting a bug report

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#feared ex-winter soldier beat by a golden maneki-neko
Ship on Stormy Seas by Ivan Konstantinovich Aivazovsky (Russian, 1817-1900)
100 year old Galapagos tortoise with a few weeks old Galapagos baby posing for a new family photo, and its own baby photo from 100 years ago.

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Whatâs funny is that this actually happened.Â
Iâm unfamiliar with this story please elaborate
Finnish soldier gets separated from the rest of his unit but heâs the only one carrying the emergency amphetamines for the unit, takes too many and goes on a one man rampage for like 2 weeks straight giving the opposing Soviet soldiers nightmares for decades. Oh and he did it all on skis.Â
Did he survive?
Yes, during his methed up 2-3 week rampage he got injured by a land mine, travelled 400km on skis, and only ate pine buds and a Siberian Jay that he caught which he ate raw. When he made it back to Finnish lines he was taken to a hospital where it was found his heart rate was nearly 200 beats per minute and his weight had dropped to 43kg (94.7lbs).
His name was Aimo Koivunen if you want to look him up
Those are the eyes of a man who has seen god and laughed
Important distinction, it wasnât âamphetaminesâ like Adderall or Vyvanse or something, it was Pervitin, prescription grade methamphetamine.
One of the few times it's 100% perfect to have an older white dude with a beard mansplain to a young girl.
Except that is not mansplaining -- mansplaining is a man, assuming he knows everything better than women simply by virtue of being a man, trying to explain something he doesnât know that much about to a woman who is expert in that area. This is a man sharing his knowledge with a woman who has clearly demonstrated she has no idea what she is talking about. Thatâs just called explaining.
when your cat licks his pawâŚthen rubs his head with the paw⌠wowâŚ.thatâs his shmapoo and conditionerâŚ..
you know whoâs gay? paul the real estate novelist who never had time for a wife and davey whoâs still in the navy and probably will be for life
New headcannon: everyone in that song is gay except the Piano Man who has no idea heâs playing at a gay bar and the staff and regulars have a betting pool on how long heâll take to finally figure it out. So far John is ahead.
âThe manager gives me a smile âcause he knows that itâs me theyâve been coming to seeâ also implies that the Piano Man is possibly an incredibly attractive but oblivious himbo, and if you listen to the rest of it imagining that, this all fits a little too well.

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