I love my giant isopod son

basketball dracula isn't real dude he can't-- *sudden squeaking noises from the shadows*

*two pool toys having sex tumble by in the wind* oh thank god

*thunderous slam dunk noise*

printers behave like that because the medieval monks they put out of work are haunting them

I think that when you're overstimulated you should appear kind of grayed out and no one should be able to interact with you like a locked character in a video game

remember when Elementary adapted the holmes stories and made Watson a woman which removed the gay subtext but then made Moriarty also a woman and gave them weird lesbian subtext. masterful technique. the never-before-seen uno yuri reverse

do you think sperm whales get scared down there. in the so dark deeps.

weed before cider youre meeting the spider. cider before weed time for centipede

I Was So Good And Polite They Are Putting Me In The Touch Tank At Aquarium Tomorrow.