In the life of A

"I want a queer show where almost every character is queer". Our flag means death.

"I want a queer show with a happy ending". Our flag means death.

"I want a queer show where the main couple ends up together". Our flag means death.

"I want a queer show where the characters are not reduced to their sexual orientation". Our flag means death.

"I want a queer show with different types of queer rep, identities and relationships". Our flag means death.

"I want a queer show with a beautiful romance". Our flag means death.

"I want a queer show that shows that you can find love at any age". Our flag means death.

"I want a queer show with the found family trope". Our flag means death.

I downloaded the PDF to my hard drive and I open it again whenever I'm feeling too suicidal to do much else, but not enough to start booking a ride to the hospital. And every time without fail I only go up to a few pages before backing off and choosing to live another day just because suicide suddenly seems even more unbearable than whatever the hell upset me in the first place.

All the book really does is [I'm pulling a summary from GoodReads here as, again, I've read no more than 5 pages] "discusses the social aspects of suicide, the right to die, anger, loneliness, depression, stress, hopelessness, drug and alcohol abuse, the consequences of a suicide attempt, and how to get help."

But it also starts with the author kindly asking the reader to complete the book before going through with anything, and for some reason I'm compelled to really just try to read it all before finalizing everything. Despite not yet completing it (hopefully never will) I think I can safely say it's saved my life at least a few times now.