you have got to stop worrying about being the hottest person at the grocery store and start shoplifting ‼️

paper and pen seems so powerful now. on account of all the. surveillance

crossfaded on apple slices and peanut butter

july is like a second go at new years. u have to treat it as such so u dont spin out

come over i wanna get phrases stuck in your head

one of the many reasons to insist upon chronological timelines is that it's much, much harder to scroll forever if you can catch up with yourself. if you can run out of tumblr because you reach yesterday, that is a good and helpful prompt to do something else.

90% of google search ai summaries feel like this guy leaning uncomfortably over your shoulder and pointing at stuff on your screen reading out the exact same text you're already looking at

my friend's puppy has baffling levels of attitude for someone who's only been around for a handful of months. he understands concepts like deceit and civil disobedience and other things i didn't fully grasp until well into my 20s. this guy doesn't even know the seasons loop yet. he's probably like okay spring. what's next. some other new bullshit i bet

mood swings are hilarious because you’ll be like “everyone loves me for my neverending joy and whimsy i’m so happy and cheerful a—post cancelled turns out i want to kill myself”

when you can sense a Mood incoming and feel like a farmer standing in a field looking out at the horizon as the storm approaches like “looks like it’s gonna be a bad one, boys”

btw if you roll a cigarette/ joint in front of me my eyes ARE glued to u and it IS in a sexually charged way

do y’all remember usernames??? from back when every fuckin website didn’t need your email phone number home address social security number just to join/sign up for something?? when you could make website-specific accounts that weren’t linked to literally anything else??? they tried to boil us like a frog slowly switching to “username/email” and then just asking for your email. but I remember. I remember usernames.

no matter how old i get and how much i try to curate myself people still do the look at each other and smirk thing when i talk

its embarrassing to have the awareness that its happening and to have the awareness that i genuinely must be the problem (or why would it keep happening) but not have the awareness to be able to stop it

"all you ever do is complain" that's not true. I also resent.

going on a guilt trip do yall want anything

if you really cared about me you wouldn't have to ask