Shitpost Central

in the club begging strangers for forgiveness and proving incapable of articulating what for when asked

a quirk of sexting while british is switching from arse to ass. i would never fuck someone in the arse. its impolite.

emotional neglect didnt even affect me that much. it was the being born inherently without value that did most of the work

Polycules should be able to trade people like sports teams do

Listen -- you're a good defender and your pussy is fantastic, but that's not what our team needs right now. We're trading you to Greater Boston in exchange for someone who has a car.

in small fandoms you need to be grateful to the person who only accidentally hit you twice with a frying pan while trying to make you breakfast. in big fandoms you can block people for wearing a shirt you don’t like

the number 1 rule of fanfic is have fun and be yourself. the number 2 rule is the average healthy adult male can lose roughly 2 liters of blood before dying.

After 13 years of this, it's still funny to me that detailing a full mental breakdown on tumblr is standard fare, but posting a nice selfie is a fraught decision.

this is the correct way around and every other social media site is wrong

being an executioner used to be an inherited job. imagine dealing with teen angst and also job shadowing your dad the town’s torturer

a warthog is a thog specialized for use in war

i love you semicolon. no one look at my 80 word sentence

friend who went to bed is a type of dead wife