What's in a title anyhow?

Colour Painting Tips by slawekfedorczuk

It can also be found on Google Drive here and on Bluesky here.

the post that was promised 🙌🏼

ok, so most folks are familiar with the idea of barriers to prevent STIs, like condoms and dental dams and gloves, but do you know why they work?

although disease-causing organisms can infect people through different pathways, most sexually transmitted infections (STIs) are passed along via fluid contact. blood, semen or prostate fluids, and vaginal/genital secretions are the main fluids of concern, although spit can carry a lot of germs generally. DON'T KISS ANYONE WITH A FEVER OR A COLD SORE, PLEASE. besides STIs, you also want to avoid getting things like mononucleosis.

so, if we prevent the exchange of fluids, we most likely prevent the exchange of infectious material, too.

i was having a hard time finding information on barrier methods for transfems with penises who no longer get erections. condoms generally rely on some amount of stretch or tension to stay on which is difficult to maintain on a soft penis even if you get smaller condoms. i don't have practical experience here, but given the physical changes that come with the influence of estrogen i would be more inclined to use lube+dental dams when performing oral and gloves for manual stimulation. if a transfem partner with a soft penis wants to top, it'd probably be safer to use a strap with a condom. TME people, please be mindful about creating pressure on your partner to penetrate you, in general and particularly considering the challenges toward practicing safer sex. any transfem folks who feel like sharing your experiences with your safer sex practices or further resources, please let me know and i will update this portion of the post!

"fluid bonding" refers to sharing fluids without the use of barrier methods with at least one play partner you trust and share health status information with, and committing to using barrier methods and/or new toys with anyone outside the fluid bond.

obviously, this can be entirely independent of romantic or monogamous involvement! however, it does require a degree of exclusivity:

"Scarleteen’s recommendation for going without barriers is: 1. Both partners getting full STI panels 2. Using barriers consistently for the next six months 3. Both partners getting another set of full (negative) STI panels before abandoning barriers."

this is to 1.) establish a baseline of health information and catch any infections before sexual contact occurs, 2.) continue protections while latent infections could still show up or other partners are in the mix, and 3.) to confirm that your barrier methods are working and no new infections have been acquired in the last six months.

there is a bit of stigma within polyamorous circles about the use of fluid bonding to indicate deeper connection and intimacy, but i think that's at least a little disingenuous because it is a deep and intimate thing to involve yourself in someone's health. i wouldn't share a bank account with everyone i've ever been sexually involved with either. why is my health status seen as a "lesser" intimacy? the conversation seems to me to be more about power dynamics and hierarchy than disease prevention. the more people you are fluid bonded with, the less that's actually an effective method of infection control.

maintaining safer sex practices is especially important if you participate in any activities that involve breaking the skin (whether scratching, biting, or with an implement) or contact with blood.

this is where universal precautions come in.

universal precautions are a set of infection control standards introduced in healthcare in 1985 in response to the HIV/AIDS crisis. the idea is that you universally treat all bodily fluids and waste materials as if they are infectious because you can't be certain that they are NOT infectious. originally, universal precautions were only applied to blood and certain body fluids, but they have been updated over the years to be more broad as we identified different pathways of infection.

this is a really important principle to understand when it comes to practicing safer sex, especially if you involve forms of edgeplay.

tests can have false negatives. doctors don't always run the full panel of tests when you ask for STI screening, sometimes they will just order panels for the STIs that are most common or concerning and you have to push them to order everything. you can't always rely on partners to know or disclose all the information that would be important to your health.

safer sex requires the awareness of disease and infection potential, which a lot of people would prefer to shove to the back of their minds, especially when getting sexy. but care is sexy! longevity is sexy! inclusion and accessibility is sexy!

for my US followers, here is a link to stdcheck.com (there's a $15 off coupon from a sex toy reviewer that i figured i'd pass along). if you don't have a primary care physician or an STI clinic in your area, this is where you can order individual blood tests and panels, and then take them into a lab like quest diagnostics to get your blood drawn. healthlabs.com (15% off this time) works the same way but offers pretty much any blood test you could want, including hormone levels!

here are a couple places that sell condoms, dental dams, and lube, as well.

“Whatever hope we had for negotiating with Solarath shattered with Diradan Tower. I respect your desire for caution, but there is a difference between patience and inaction. Tonight was the last night of peace. The Guild is headed for open conflict and the lines have been drawn. We can fight and argue amongst ourselves, but there is no other avenue now. Whoever retrieves the Astrial will be the first victor in this war.”

Umbria Bellaris is an archsage of the Guild of Mages and the leader of the Order of Lethalis. Despite her quiet and reserved demeanour, she has been considered unusual by her colleagues due to her unorthodox approach to magic and research. As one of Diradan Tower’s most skilled graduates, she rapidly climbed through the ranks and made a name of herself. She is relatively untested as a teacher, having taught only two apprentices in her career.

Before the tower explosion, Umbria’s research investigated new forms of curative magic and ways to resuscitate the clinically dead. She began this research while studying under Sabien Quirinus, her former mentor.

Umbria is introduced in Episode 2.

Lost Kitchen Scrolls

It has a huge variety of historical recipes from different regions, taken from manuscripts, transcribed and translated, and a whole section of notes about the context for the recipe. It's really fun and I AM going to try a couple of these recipes.

Look at how this lamb recipe is presented:

This is just such a fun way to learn more about historical foodways and discover traditional cuisine.

Look at all the filters you can use:

Maybe if I can forage some good blackberries this year, I can make a 300 year old recipe for blackberry wine!

However, he replied to said email within five minutes, asking a question that required an answer. So I answered and was like "Also, I was going to apologize for answering emails during this call, but I see we're both here at the Devil's Sacrament, so I don't think an apology is necessary."

I watched him read that on screen and try not to laugh. And then at the end of the call as everyone started saying goodbye, he goes, "Hey, MJ, I meant to tell you. I like your shoelaces."

And I looked straight into my camera, stone cold serious, and said, "Thanks. I stole them from the president."

And the rest of the team was like, "What...the fuck...?" before he abruptly ended the call for everyone.