Dangerous dresses and beautiful blades

yes, India made legal gender change impossible but my friends have always gendered me correctly and stick to it even when it confuses other people and my friend's little sibling calls me older brother in Kannada yes, India made legal gender change impossible but my dog learned my new name quicker than the humans and she runs to give me a kiss when she's told to without being confused about who's being referred to

yes, India made legal gender change impossible but I can feel the Adam's apple growing in my throat and my muscles getting stronger, and my smile more real and I'm growing a beard, and I talk more freely

⚔️ BWOOM

👽

⚔️ BWOOM

sports team names in 1900: we will be the Townsburg Coppermen because the old copper mine employs 80% of the town

sports team names in 1920: we will be the Townsburg [RACIAL SLUR] because that’s what a journalist called us and we like it and in 75 years we will have to come up with a story about how it’s actually a tribute to the brave and noble [INDIGENOUS PEOPLE WHO WERE FORCIBLY RELOCATED]

sports team names in 1950: we will be the Townsburg Tigers because we just had to order 50 new jerseys and this is the logo they had in the catalog

sports team names in 1990: we will be the Townsburg Royals because the team’s new owner is a third cousin of the King of Denmark and he’s threatening to relocate if he doesn’t get $50 million in public funds for a new stadium

sports team names in 2026: we will be the Townsburg Copper Daddies because we want to pay #tribute to our town’s #history but our brand consultant told us that this name will get people to talk about us on social media

sports team names in 2030: we will be the Townsburg Copper Daddies Presented By Kalshi in order to make a little extra money on the side

sports team names in 2050: we will be the New Townsburg Relocators because the all-encompassing fog has enveloped Old Townsburg

- was the only one to get an A the first grading period. had to stop them from putting me on their shoulders

- became the official classroom mascot on account of i was the only girl. this meant i was an integral stop on any and all workshop tours. was referred to as “Our Lady Helena” on these occasions

- almost set myself on fire once bc my prof stood behind me watching me try a skill he’d just demonstrated and he shouted very suddenly very loudly. restarted my heart and asked WTF WAS THAT FOR JOHN and he called me a “goddamn wonder”. i almost got third degree burned over a compliment

- mentioned offhand ONE TIME that swords were cool. also mentioned my birthday offhand ONE TIME. one of The Guys remembered both instances and also happened to find a sword in a dumpster so he gave it to me for my birthday

- came in fifth in an arm wrestling competition

- french braided my hair in class bc i didn’t have time to do it beforehand. ended up with an audience of like 5+ guys trying to figure out how tf i was doing it

- told The Guys my college friends call me barbie. Mistake. suddenly had all 12 of them calling me Barbarian

- had some down time and made a silly little sculpture with some scraps. The Guys were endlessly intrigued by this and demanded to see some of my art school stuff. had a small crowd around my phone cheering loudly every time i swiped to a new picture

- accidentally mentioned the cafe i worked at. Mistake. several days later all 12 of them came in to bother me

i don't know the etiquette for posting other peoples tiktoks but the delivery of this punchline hit me like a FUCKING TRUCK please