I’M MOVING TO ANOTHER URL
I have decided, finally, to start this blog from scratch. I haven’t been actively writing in the past few months – and, frankly, given real life stuff & how small this fandom is, I’ll probably continue being more the sporadic poster – BUT, if you still want to follow me for whatever reason you might have, I will be at @anne-boyd. Initially I planned to delete this blog completely, but after giving it some thought I decided to hide it from web, meaning it will only be available in the dashboard. I will transfer some of the content that was written here into my new blog, I’m just not sure how much of it. If there’s any particular story that you want me to transfer into the next one, let me know (note: there are some among them that I do not wish to transfer).
Tagging the people I have most interacted with in the past months either writing, reading or just chatting with me: @fangsharrison, @dreamcrboy, @lebratprincess, @pink0045, @lovemaureen, @geriatricfool
That’s pretty much all. I’m writing a little explanation of this decision below but it’s only because this blog has a special place in my heart since I’ve had it for so long, but feel free to skip this part if you wish.
The main reason as to why I’m doing this is because I’ve had this blog for about 5 years and since then, naturally, I have changed a lot and nowadays I am no longer comfortable with a lot of things from my old posts. I thought about taking some time to delete those but, let’s be realistic, life is short and I have over 20 thousand posts. The thing is, when I made this blog, I had just gotten out of an abusive relationship (that started shortly after I had gotten out of… another abusive relationship, lol) – which is largely why I wound up making a blog for Pattie, since I connected with her experiences at the time. I was also still struggling with depression then, so basically I was a complete mess when I started this blog. I also didn’t know a thing about roleplaying, I didn’t know how it worked and gradually I started figuring it out. But some of the things that bother me about the history of this blog are:
1. The amount of personal rants I’ve posted. It’s always been most comfortable in venting my problems here because no one here knows me in real life so it’s something of little consequence. However, I often forget to delete these posts afterwards and I would like to bury them once and for all.
2. Given that I was a pile of emotional wreckage back in those days, I went out of my comfort zone too often when it comes to the plots (and ships) I used to write because I didn’t know how to say no to people and I wanted to please everyone. Which resulted in threads that I now cringe to remember.
3. Not to mention people who have actually forced and manipulated situations in threads that I am as uncomfortable with today as I was the day I wrote it. Rolepaying back then wasn’t as chill as it is today lol. This stuff includes sexually objectifying my muse, adding elements in the story that conflicted with my interpretation of Pattie, among other things, so you can guess why it’s a problematic thing for me. Especially the former NSFW content and heavier themes. While I don’t have a problem with neither NSFW or heavy themes, I wouldn’t have written them today in the way I did in the past.
4. I know it’s not ill-intended, but sometimes I still get notifications in some of those posts from years ago and frankly, that makes me very, very very uncomfortable for the reasons listed above. Besides…
5. This blog has like, over 2 thousand unanswered messages from the past 5 years and over 900 followers who I think are mostly inactive nowadays, and I prefer to have a neat blog with like, 10 followers tops that I can easily organize from scratch.
I hope not to offend anyone who has written with me in the past and neither to reject accountability for the stuff that I’ve written which have come to bother me a few years later but given my long attachment to this blog, I feel this explanation was due. Hopefully, I will be able to keep my next blog neat, organized and without so much ooc and politics (the second will be harder though). Thanks for reading!
