zigazig ha

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the most universally sacred childhood experience for milllenials was listening to breakaway by kelly clarkson as we dramatically stared out the window during long car rides

Man human imprinting is crazy. My friend’s roomba zoomed by me and I got this intense urge to reach down and pat it. Like it’s just a machine? But it’s a good boy? It spends all day cleaning and sleeping and exploring the house and never complains and it’s just so good little robot? Pet robot?? Pet the robot????? Why am I like this???

When I bought my roomba the lady at the store told me that if it breaks within warranty and I send it back to the manufacturer, I can request that they fix and send back the same roomba instead of just sending back a new one. I gave her a confused look and she explained that people get attached to Their Roomba and don’t want them to just be replaced because they’re like part of the family. Humans are pretty great.

thats just the way the pussy crumbles

WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE I AM

he looks like a villain from a movie where the protagonist is a dog

DAMMIT RIGHT

Didn’t know bowling was so serious

im in philosophy and were talking about how you can doubt everything’s existence except for your own consciousness and the guy that sits in front of me just turns around tears streaming down his face and goes “i am on so many drugs”

So you decided to throw money at it like a stripper

stop the objectification of rabbits now

SHES THE PRINCESS EVERYBODY WANTS

someday, in the distant future, humans will once again be capable of hearing the phrase “what is love” without also feeling the primal urge to  respond with “baby don’t hurt me”

So at that point, people will say “baby don’t hurt me”…no more?

I tried to scroll past I really did

beautiful set up, perfect follow-through. great teamwork everyone

this is literally my favorite piece that ever comes up on tumblr and if you want me to change my mind well then goOD LUCK WITH THAT