I love /to/ you.

a couple weeks ago this guy posted in the chicago pagan facebook group saying that he’s a djinn and that there’s a portal between here and egypt and only he and one other person had the power to close it and there was going to be a massive sandstorm… like dude, close the fucking portal, why are you even telling us this

this is the security guard at rics who kicked me out for having a satchel with nothing in it

Black cilantro margaritas ladies!!!!

Bitch no one wants to hear Phoebe Brisgers put Rihanna on

i shoot a some web out of my lil peter if u know what i mean

what do you mean?

the names trudy. trudy tective

maggie is the most awesome dog in the world

FUCKKKKKKK what if something bad happened and I forgot to worry about it