THE SPIRIT OF LONDON AT NIGHT!!!!

a severe thunderstorm warning that doesnt follow through is worse than orgasm denial

I would take a job pushing the Sisyphus rock if it paid 20 an hour and I could wear my headphones

“but he did [this horrific thing]” i am neither his keeper nor happy with every single decision he makes. Also he is not real

stay safe because i like being alive at the same time as you.

you are just cranky because i took something imperceptible from you and you cannot recall it in its absence but you feel the edges of it anyway

repeat after me: people don’t notice the little details. i’m going to get away with it. people don’t notice the little details. i’m going to get away with it.

This email could have been a flayed screaming man

If a person's friends are racist and they don't care because it doesn't impact them or they try to reframe their buddy's racist behavior as something else, they are also racist, okay? 🫶

notice how everyone is horny today

i have a false tooth filled with a placebo in case i'm ever captured and need to be a control subject