how is your day?

having VR sex and she's hitting my amazing digital cervix

sorry, I made this joke like two weeks ago. Yeah no we're gonna kill you now. Yep, nothing you can do about it, pack it up

A common theme in science fiction is that if you're in space, don't trust a corporation. And Earth is in space

when people are like “he’s not even attractive you could find a guy that looks like him at any gas station” i’m like….. well you see there’s beauty everywhere actually

You can also find a sunset at a gas station

And if I said Megamind is one of the few movies that understands Superman.

And if I said Megamind through its three subversions of Superman shows a deeper understanding that the point of Superman is that he was loved and taught to love by good, present parents, and because of that he is able to return that love to a world even if it doesn't always accept it, and he is not corrupted by his power, than many other films either subverting or playing the superman story straight.

Gay Winston from Overwatch: Excuse me for... being gay

He doesn't need a fucking excuse honey that's the point of PRIDE Winston !!!!

PROUD Gay Winston: Did somebody say... penis?

It should 100% be illegal for companies to make you give them your payment information when you sign up for a free trial version of their product. It is not necessary and there is no good fucking reason for them to do it. It’s blatantly just so they can steal forgetful customers’ money.

oh hey, thanks for reminding me to cancel a free trial i had going on.

Reblog to save an unnecessary charge cause it also reminded me to cancel a trial lol

everyone who reblogs this and is like "I ordered my own tea this week" or "I only barfed once when I had to give a presentation'- you are doing amazing sweetie. Have patience with yourself, you are relearning a skill so difficult that people get 4 year degrees to do it professionally.

The little details are literally everythingggg I don’t want to hear anyone say they’re a waste of time….. picking that lil cute outfit before work….. learning a new hairstyle……. buying your sister surprise flowers……. changing up your perfume for the day…… stopping by a cute spot otw home……. switching up your routine for the day……. trying a new restaurant…….. hello where is the whimsy

Also it’s always stuff that doesn’t even take that long but it can have such a profound effect

let me slip into something more harder to get out of

imagining a universe where porn is a marketable genre so you have to deal with raycon ads while trying to jerk your shit

You’re an easy slut, aren’t you kitten? Almost as easy as dinner with Hellofresh

there are teenagers today using smartphones who don’t even remember the real gun emoji. they have never experienced it.

Look how much gun violence this prevented.

that's more direct action than the entirety of the United States Government has taken in 30 years what are you talking about

my fav pokemon fact is that 25% of marill are canonically trans masc