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@homunculus-tech-support
🙏HOT PRIESTS🙏 in YOUR AREA!
>✝️CLICK HERE✝️< to learn the techniques to luring them to your gothic manor! 🏰🦇🩸
ONE SIMPLE SECRET THE 🇻🇦🚫VATICAN🚫🇻🇦 DOESN'T WANT YOU TO KNOW 🤫😳
DO NOT CLICK ON THESE TYPES OF LINKS PEOPLE THEY WILL INFECT YOUR TOWER'S DEFENSES AND LIQUIFY YOUR HOMUNCULUS
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The Druid's beastly summons keep accosting me with "thanks" but I don't know how to tell them I have more than enough acorns.
AND they track mud into my homunculus slop
<):-/
homunculus tech support here: please tell me you arent storing your substrates and serums on the floor.
The beasts dare to leap through my window onto my desk, right into the slop
homunculus tech support here: perhaps you should consider a lid
The Druid's beastly summons keep accosting me with "thanks" but I don't know how to tell them I have more than enough acorns.
AND they track mud into my homunculus slop
<):-/
homunculus tech support here: please tell me you arent storing your substrates and serums on the floor.
WHO CAST ERUPTING EARTH AROUND MY TOWER I WILL CURSE YOU AND YOUR ENTIRE BLOODLINE
CASTERS!
There has been a homuncuLOSS in the tower tonight!
Homunculus solidified and spontaneously shattered into crystalized smithereens.
<):-(
Have no fear for I will persevere on this endeavor
did you imbue it with the essence of your soul? it’s easy to forget but the homunculus IS an extension of yourself meant to take over various tedious tasks you don’t want to do (much like an unseen servant or blood imp) but without a piece of you it will explode.
casting good luck for your next attempt <):-)
this is common misinformation, while imbuing a homunculus with a piece of one's soul can make it more resistant to exploding, the homunculus wont spontaneously explode without it. you are correct about the homunculus being an extension of oneself tho. i see too many people having homunculi do the jobs of constructs or familiars.
especially low quality homunculi made directly from poorly translated alchemical texts can even taint ones soul. its not that bad but you may find yourself enjoying country music slightly more then normal.
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CASTERS!
There has been a homuncuLOSS in the tower tonight!
Homunculus solidified and spontaneously shattered into crystalized smithereens.
<):-(
Have no fear for I will persevere on this endeavor
did you imbue it with the essence of your soul? it’s easy to forget but the homunculus IS an extension of yourself meant to take over various tedious tasks you don’t want to do (much like an unseen servant or blood imp) but without a piece of you it will explode.
casting good luck for your next attempt <):-)
my homunculus is once again reconstituted but i believe he’s unhappy about it as he just screams a lot at random intervals. almost considering killing him and making a new one
turning into a liquid is not fun and can really mess with ones brain (or your homunculus's equivalent)
a simple memory erasing spell targeting the last few weeks should get rid of most of the surface level issues, but you may want to consider opening him up and replacing his brain altogether.
i recommend growing your own replacement brain in a similar environment to the homunculus's artificial womb but you can order pre-made brains off of wizardzon or fireballmart.
im not even the type of guy to go "actually it's frankenstein's MONSTER" because a painting by rembrandt or picasso or any other artist is often called "a rembrandt" or "a picasso" as shorthand. so in this respect frankenstein's monster can be considered "a frankenstein"
darling I love your 8 foot tall patchwork flesh creature, it really livens up the place. is that an authentic frankenstein?
it's only a true frankenstein if it was produced in the frankenstein region of switzerland. otherwise it's just a sparkling homunculus
dont mean to be the erm actually guy, (even though thats my job) but since Frankenstein didnt grow his monster from a substrate in an artificial womb it wouldnt be a homunculus. common misconception.
STOP TRYING TO TEACH YOUR HOMUNCULI MAGIC
as homunculi are inherently alchemical creatures, trying to teach them any magic that isnt basic alchemy will NOT work.
Just a reminder to any prospective homunculus owners that homunculi are normally very solitary creatures and putting more then two in the same household will most likely result in bickering and a rivalry.
the materials added to the substrate can be altered to make the homunculus more social but most (e.g. giant ant extract, bee testes.) are very expensive and prone to causing violent failure in the mixture.
if you need more hands to stir your bubbling cauldrons and sort your arcane ingredients consider small golems or magical constructs. besides, homunculi are often small and unsuited to laborious tasks. despite their creation process, they are still creatures that get tired. especially intelligent homunculi (like ones grown with genuine human brain matter, tough to come by these days) are more suited to managing the lesser constructs while you are away fireballing paladins and making vagrants have horrible visions of the end times.
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Working on my first homunculus, starting with clay, chicken bones, and the blood of a valiant swordsman
homonculus tech support here: did you allow for the required 16 days of fermentation in the festering womb of horse? (note that the "womb of horse" is actually a sealed jar containing horse dung as a substrate for the homonculus, however an actual severed womb of a mare can be used with limited sucess.)
or was the homunculus solid previously and turned to goo recently?
(note that "required" is a strong word, you can get away with less then a quarter horse dung by weight for the substrate, and 16 days is on the longer end)
hello homunculus tech support, it was solid and then melted into goo. i have scraped him off the floor and put him in a jar for now, but he is NOT happy about it. i don’t know how to explain to him that the jar is for his safety (my familiar tried to lick him off the floor) when he just warbles and gurgles in response to everything i say.
oh, that sound like it could be a hex or curse. have you checked the integrity of your tower's Wall Of Flames? casting Norton's Malevolent De-Hexer or Affee's Lower Curse Remover should fix it.
have you brought any suspicious artifacts into your tower? the Dark Market is rife with these sorts of things. weird that it only targeted your homunculus though, normally these things spew miasmas or summon lower demons.
once the curse is lifted your homunculus should reform without issue, but he might be a little sticky for a while and his skin will be a little sensitive. supply him with a tub of ashes to use as a dust bath until his skin fully heals.
as for him being angered about the jar, cover the jar with a thick cloth so he calms down.
fuck…i knew i was forgetting about something after the latest knight’s quest of breaking into my tower… might have to curse the kingdom again to keep them away from my tower
you can be evil and despicable and a fucked up little wretch if you want but never forget that you deserve love. and you still have love to give. 1 quillion dead cops
this message has been approved by the Holy Knight of the East
Working on my first homunculus, starting with clay, chicken bones, and the blood of a valiant swordsman
homonculus tech support here: did you allow for the required 16 days of fermentation in the festering womb of horse? (note that the "womb of horse" is actually a sealed jar containing horse dung as a substrate for the homonculus, however an actual severed womb of a mare can be used with limited sucess.)
or was the homunculus solid previously and turned to goo recently?
(note that "required" is a strong word, you can get away with less then a quarter horse dung by weight for the substrate, and 16 days is on the longer end)
hello homunculus tech support, it was solid and then melted into goo. i have scraped him off the floor and put him in a jar for now, but he is NOT happy about it. i don’t know how to explain to him that the jar is for his safety (my familiar tried to lick him off the floor) when he just warbles and gurgles in response to everything i say.
oh, that sound like it could be a hex or curse. have you checked the integrity of your tower's Wall Of Flames? casting Norton's Malevolent De-Hexer or Affee's Lower Curse Remover should fix it.
have you brought any suspicious artifacts into your tower? the Dark Market is rife with these sorts of things. weird that it only targeted your homunculus though, normally these things spew miasmas or summon lower demons.
once the curse is lifted your homunculus should reform without issue, but he might be a little sticky for a while and his skin will be a little sensitive. supply him with a tub of ashes to use as a dust bath until his skin fully heals.
as for him being angered about the jar, cover the jar with a thick cloth so he calms down.
Working on my first homunculus, starting with clay, chicken bones, and the blood of a valiant swordsman
homonculus tech support here: did you allow for the required 16 days of fermentation in the festering womb of horse? (note that the "womb of horse" is actually a sealed jar containing horse dung as a substrate for the homonculus, however an actual severed womb of a mare can be used with limited sucess.)
or was the homunculus solid previously and turned to goo recently?
(note that "required" is a strong word, you can get away with less then a quarter horse dung by weight for the substrate, and 16 days is on the longer end)
!!!ATTENTION!!!
DO NOT USE PIGS BLOOD AS A SUBSTITUTE FOR HUMAN WHEN FEEDING YOUR NEWLY CREATED HOMUNCULUS!!!
IT DOES NOT HAVE THE REQUIRED ANTIBODIES!!!! THEY WILL GET SICK!!!!!
homunculi past 1 week old can subsist off of pigs blood, but it is not recommended to wean your homunculus off of human blood until 4 week of age, otherwise their growth may be stunted.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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