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the scene where alana is like “i feel like I’ve been poisoned” and will’s like “we’ve all been poisoned” is funny in hindsight because alana is talking about how she was being fed human meat and cartilage beer for 8 months and will is talking about how he’s kind of in love with hannibal

Did I ever talk abt the time i was at a bdsm club and one of the pups was on all fours and barking and being cute and the dom on scene was like “hi puppy! Do you do any tricks?” And he said “I can beatbox!”

I was like. Doubled over incapacitated laughing the entire time. He was really good and a big sweetheart and I felt kinda bad but I couldn’t stop thinking “why the am I getting the beatboxing puppy unskippable cutscene at the bdsm club”

im gonna say it. i find the "get me out of Latin America" style of memes to be a tool for perpetuating the exodus of young people from this continent so there is nobody left to oppose the pillaging of it by imperial potencies. latinos moving out of lat am to "greener pastures" (europe or the anglosphere) are participating in me-first, save yourself style escapism and i kinda hate it

this is in English so latigringos can participate in the conversation too 🫶🏼 i hope you're just momentarily living elsewhere with the goal of sacking the imperial core to return stolen wealth back to latin america and make it a better place!

“This kink is problematic when you think about it” ohhhhhh shit ok lemme head on over to the kink store and trade these kinks in for one that make my jackoff fantasies morally superior

you really do turn thirty and everything is different and sometimes better. if you're in line for thirty stay in line bro

oh so when john wick goes on a revenge killing spree to avenge his murdered dog, he’s an awesome action hero. but when kara zor el beats up and kills the child sex trafficker who poisoned her dog, she’s the worst most selfish awful mean person

we all know adult humans dont get enough enrichment but the other day i was walkin home past an empty playground and impulsively ran over to spin myself on this zipline merry-go-round contraption for a few minutes and it really did feel like it unlocked some neglected part of my brain. like damn we really should all go outside and play more. fuck. they werent kidding with this play time thing. have you guys heard about play time. it could be huge.

if you're ever beating yourself up for 'missing the obvious hints' that someone is romantically interested in you, know this: i once met a guy who asked out a girl after she sent him nude pictures of herself in the bath and she said she wasn't interested. it is never obvious