posts I want my brother to see

White boy CONFUSES Mexican restaurant staff by ordering in perfect Mandarin.

[Image ID: Tumblr reply from paerAndPencilsAndSkips reading: Mexican restaurant shocks white boy with 1000 volts of electricity /End ID]

the Cc in emails stands for Cuck chair

happy first day of pride everyone

ive invented (note: dubious claim) something i call the bear diet which is mostly fruits and vegetables with fish as the main protein source and something like once a month you eat a few hyperprocessed foods of your liking because that is when you, the bear, raid a dumpster in the suburbs

I can be trusted with the fictional character. I Promise.

I lied. Fuck it’s dire y’all. It’s Bad.

[ID: a character guessing game in Roblox. Pictures of Mario are lined up, stretching infinitely into the distance. A player named Masterimtropolis guesses, "mario, mario, Mario, DEAR GOD ITS ALL MARIO". end ID]

Enough of this. Now put on caramelldansen

being a kid and hearing adults say stuff like "woah 2011 was 4 years ago haha" didn't really convey the fucking horror of a youtube video crossing my recommended labelled "9 years ago" and it's from 2017. that's not true. 9 years ago is 2010 or something. don't lie.

[Image description: a screenshot (overlayed with a rainbow filter) of Miles Edgeworth from Ace Attorney saying "Your pride...?"]

Image ID: A screenshot of an AO3 fic. It reads “I don’t dance”, Sasuke snapped back. “Anyway, what’s Gay Pride Day? What are they proud of?” The chapter ends there. End ID

hbo max blocks screenshots even when I use the snipping tool AND firefox AND ublock which is a fucking first. i will never understand streaming services blocking the ability to take screenshots thats literally free advertising for your show right there. HOW THE HELL IS SOMEBODY GONNA PIRATE YOUR SHOW THROUGH SCREENSHOTS. JACKASS

somewhere out there is a guy who meticulously takes screenshots of every individual frame of his favorite tv shows and then painstakingly etches each one onto a roll of film which he puts into his old timey projector and recreates the footage as a silent film with his own lavishly hand-lettered dialogue cards and original score that he plays on his upright piano and charges audiences one shiny penny a play. at last, big media has finally outsmarted ol' Zachary Zoetrope

This also fixes screen sharing to other screens. It has been GODSEND

ol' Zachary Zoetrope is back in business!

[ID: An fale screenshot of Genius lyrics showing a quote from a Taylor Swift song called, Rainbow Dress, that says, “I wanna have straight sex / At the gay pride parade.” End ID.]

fucked that you can’t fix other people especially when you really care about them. Oh so im just supposed to be there for you while you suffer. like a useless cunt gargoyle

[video desc: person impaling two watermelons on a stake for their small army of guinea pigs to consume, which is filmed on fast forward and oddly threatening. screenshotted tag reads "eaten alive by toupees"]