Constantine & Hellblazer Fan Fiction

it is HELLBLAZER WEDNESDAY FUCK YES!

the tenth issue of Spurrier’s absolutely terrific series is out now and you can pick it up HERE!

Finally in the home stretch now after putting a solid couple of hours into it last night! I'm excited to send this one off 😊

sooo i have Realized that a common thread running through characters i really, really like is a tendency to be really fucking rude. just. an absolutely raised-by-wolves disgraceful little shit. not fit for human consumption. terrible. just terrible. 

thing is, there’s a ton of different reasons for rudeness, and in John’s case, when John is rude, most of the time it’s tactical. John is rude because John is choosing to be rude, either because he wants to antagonize his enemies into doing something stupid or because he wants to keep his allies at arm’s length. regardless; the rudeness is deliberate. John knows how to be respectful, knows how to be polite, of course he does, he’s a professional conman. dude lies for a living.

but also, there’s a whole conversation to be had about the classism racism sexism etc inherent in conventional British notions of politeness and Proper Behavior and how Hellblazer tends to have 0 tolerance for rich people bullshit because it is a good comic book, and also how the many demons and gods and other stand ins for powerful rich arseholes John encounters almost always EXPECT cowering veneration from humans and he knows that and knows how to use that against them, so politeness can be a weapon just as much as rudeness is a weapon

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Rating: Explicit

Pairings/Characters: Lucifer Morningstar/John Constantine

Word Count: 3,603 (complete, one shot)

Summary: It’s terrible, isn’t it, when your guilt condenses into that burning singularity, a black hole emptier than any pain you’ve ever felt and all you can do is let yourself be drawn into it, knowing that each time it becomes harder and harder to claw your way back out again. What do you do then, John?

Request: John Constantine What no good morning kiss?

For @a-really-bi-girl

“John.” I said shaking the man still laying in bed. He groaned. I bit back a laugh. “John come on. You have to get up. I’m going to be late and Chas will kill you.” I could tell he was awake but just didn’t want to get up. I leaned over him and tried to catch his eye. “Come on. Get up.” He looked up at me, almost daring me to make him move. “I’m making a full english.” That got him up quickly. He started to gather his clothes as I left the room to tend to the breakfast. I could hear him moving around the room getting dressed in the clothes he kept in my closet. I hummed to myself as I put on the radio and started plating the food. When I turned around, John was sitting at the island, watching me. “I have something on me?” I asked, my cheeks heating up under his gaze. John smirked and shook his head. 

“Don’t worry love. You’re as clean as you can be.” He winked at me, making me laugh at his double meaning.

“Then why are you staring Constantine?” I asked as I sat the plate in front of him. John gave me a small smile. 

“Cheers love.” He said as he tucked in. 

“Answer the question Constantine.” I laughed as I pulled his plate away a little. John looked up at me with a smirk again and reached for his plate. I kept pulling it away each time he reached for it. “You aren’t getting this back until you answer the question.” I laughed as he pouted. 

“Can’t I just stare for no reason?” John laughed back. I shook my head and pushed the plate back in his reach. “You’re just so damn gorgeous. Even this early in the morning.” John chuckled and shook his head. “I don’t understand how that is possible.” I smiled softly at him and put his plate back in front of him. 

“You’re too cute John Constantine.” I said as I took my own plate and moved to sit down next to him. John leaned over and bumped his shoulder against mine. I laughed at the face he gave me. “What is it John?” He leaned his head against my shoulder as we ate. He would look up at me occasionally and I could see the gears turning in his head. John was always an easy man to read but hard to crack. He stayed like that until I had to put the dishes in the sink, never answering my question. 

“Don’t worry about those.” He said as he stood up. John grabbed my coat off the couch and held it up for me. I smiled as I walked over to him. 

“You gonna do them?” I asked with a laugh. If John was doing the dishes I wanted to be there to see it. John shrugged and smiled back at me. 

“Maybe.” He said. I shook my head and put my arms in the sleeves of the coat. 

“Without magic.” I said looking over my shoulder at John as he pulled the coat up around my shoulders. He smoothed out the shoulders as I turned around. John gave me a tight lipped grin and shrugged. “I’ll take that as a no.” I laughed and grabbed my stuff as I headed to the door. John trailed behind me, almost looking like a lost puppy, not knowing what he was doing to do for the rest of the day while I was at work. “Don’t burn the house down while I’m gone Constantine.” John nodded as he looked at me with that far off look again. I was getting frustrated with it and I finally broke. I didn’t care if I ended up being late. “What is it John Constantine? What is that damn look for?” John smiled at his feet and looked up me. 

“What no good morning kiss?” He finally said. I laughed as it finally dawned on me. John kept smiling at me as I walked closer to him. 

“That’s what this is all about?” I asked as I pressed my body against his and slid my arms around his neck. John smiled smugly down at me. 

“Yeah. You always give me a good morning kiss no matter how late you are running.” He pouted slightly. “But not this morning.” I giggled and kissed his cheek. 

“Not this morning.” I whispered against his cheek. I pulled back and looked him the eye. “I’ll have to fix that now won’t I?” John nodded and smiled softly at me before I pressed my lips to his. I pulled back slightly after a few moments but lingered close to him. I glance up at him. “Better?” John swayed slightly and smiled. 

“Not yet.” He kissed me again and I couldn’t help but smile into the kiss. He pulled away and held me at arm’s length. “I love you (Y/N).” He said seriously. My eyes went wide. It was the first time he had said that to me. In my shock I almost forgot that he was waiting for a response. 

“I love you too John.” I said as I quickly pressed my lips to his again. When we broke apart again, I caught a glimpse of the clock. “Shit! I gotta go John!” I grabbed my stuff and nearly flew out the door but not before pressing another kiss to his lips. “I love you John Constantine!” I called as I got in my car. John watched as I drove off and ran a finger over his lips.