Fix You In A Formulated Phrase

when the bard’s playing even moves the ranger’s animal companion

being a movie snob is the worst thing possible like im sorry you need neon lights and 3 minute silent staring contest scenes to get your balls to drop. watch legally blonde for some real art

As someone who’s worked in several cafes, I’m mad at how accurate this is.

I will forever remember the time my friend and I were out for chinese food. we got up to pay and I (the short one with bottom energy i guess?) revealed that I would be paying for the meal, and the elderly man at the counter just flat out said “Oh, YOU’RE the boss!”

abac (assigned bottom at chili’s)

u know that thing where an animals grow in a far off place and some idiot introduces him to a new habitat and it turns out its characteristics that help them in their own sometimes are too helpful in the new one and they become like an invasive species yeah thats the word i was missing anyway back to my point i think i saw a human version of that just now i was driving in tonights snow storm and i saw a man wearing a big ass cowboy hat to keep the snow off him and a bandit red bandana to keep it off his face and a big ass pancho to keep him warm and nice ass cowboy boots to keep his calves dry and he was prancing along while everyone on the road looked miserable and frozen solid and idk i guess the point im trying to make here is i feel like cowboys would have taken over russia if given the chance or something

STOP Asgdhdkkskfkff

As a pilot I am ashamed, this is disgusting and unethical. I can not BELIEVE that you would do such a sinful thing as to perform oral pleasure on a pilot, during flight, in the bathroom when the cockpit is RIGHT THERE. it’s literally a COCKpit. It’s IN THE NAME