heartoheart

also find me on @nvymi, @thingscantgetstranger, @impulpfree, @ilovesoursweet, & @gotalotofbark

But oh, how good it feels to finally be chosen.

DANGER IS NEAR. DO NOT REST. I stumble across the living room, the alcohol in my system setting comfortably into my blood. You smile as my body falls on your couch, vulnerable. Moving closer and closer until you’re next to me. Your hand naturally finds its way to my thigh. My heart aches at the touch. Sweet words are being whispered as the tears start to form. I don’t mean to. I never mean to. But how it hurts.  You wipe them away as they glide down my rose-colored cheeks. I didn’t mean to. I never wanted to give you the pleasure of seeing my pain. My heart hurts. I’ve lost control of myself. You indulge in it. Cooing me as the sniffling turns into weeping. Fingers exploring further as you wrap yourself around me. Asking me what’s wrong, telling me you can make me feel better. The hunger in your eyes, masked by that fake worrying, I’ve become oh so used to.

And, I find myself sitting next to you waiting with a glass of orange juice for either of us to say the things we left unspoken.

And I constantly wonder, when will I be worthy of love?

Yet, I still kept on writing them

It had made itself down the grapevine and, somehow, I was the last to know.

do you think you would’ve ever liked me if I didn’t leave you first?