I'd rather die than loose my life

My mom likes to tell me about how when I was a little kid riding public transport with her I'd always smile and giggle and chat with weird old ladies who smelled like cat pee and homeless folks and strangers dressed in bizarre outfits but any time a tidy and respectable businessman in a suit and tie waved at me I'd immediately clam up, and she takes a great deal of pride in my supposed inherentability to clock personalities but the truth is I do vaguely remember those bus rides, and it was never about the clothes or the hair or the smell, but more because everyone "strange" asked interesting questions and listened to what I had to say and seemed to think about what I said while the neat and tidy and rigid folks only ever acted like they were going through the motions, which was boring as hell and also pretty annoying

I have just combined all rice in the world into a single rouse

Sneebert Deebert

they should teach useful skills in school like home economics and how to safely pirate media

Hey, what’s Winnie the pooh’s favorite color?

Yellow

No it’s red because of his shirt

No, it’s yellow because he loves honey

You have no idea what you’re talking about

Things heating up at the Winnie the Pooh fandom

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

getting on the treadmill at the gym and listening to bloodcurdling screams and scary noises and running as fast as i can screaming and crying and freaking out and looking behind me like someone's chasing me for like 30 minutes and then i immediately stop and leave like nothing happened

got my first ever official customer complaint because when i was going over the terms of their life insurance they were like "well i don't plan to die" and i was like "well you're going to"

i've been phasing the phrase 'google it' out of my vocabulary and going back to 'look it up'. fuck you youve lost your generic trademark privileges

People in the notes need to shut the hell up about ai datacenters this is about the US military which you people are clearly not the true victims of so please fuck off and make your own post somewhere I'm not gonna see it.

USAmericans will really see a post about the harm they cause and go "is no one gonna talk about how I'm the real victim here? 🥺" And NOT wait for an answer

The USA cannot be reformed, first of all because its existence requires the subjugation of an entire hemisphere at minimum, and second because the average USian is dumb as bricks

explosion at health potion factory 0 dead 0 injured

Just saw a fish get his head torn asunder by a massive cleaver. Hope he’s okay.

He is not.

I'm trying to remain optimistic

kittens are amazing bc they're like what if a wayward ball of lint was also made of knives

GLaDOS voice: "Would you like to see some artwork I generated? I've heard from other test subjects that AI-generated artwork produces an uncanny valley response in human viewers because they can't perceive it as fully real. They've told me that it looks absolutely hideous to them, that they can't imagine anything more disgusting than AI art. But, well I've been practicing and wanted your honest opinion. Feel free to let me know how ugly you find this by ranking it on a scale from 'vomit-inducing' to 'eye-bleeding'." A robotic arm lowers from the ceiling holding a hand mirror up to Chell's face