The Witch of Stolen Tomorrows had begun to notice an odd trend amongst her petitioners.
The latest was a farmer. He had braved the journey through the Testing Woods and arrived with his convictions mostly intact. He now sat on a tree stump by the Witchโs thornbush cottage, drinking a cup of bitter tea, and asking for a fairly standard boon.
"Oh yes," said the Witch, "I can make you a spell for a bountiful harvest, but what will you give me in return?"
The farmer gulped. "My firstborn child?"
"By the dick-shattered sky.โ The Witch exclaimed. โWhat?"
"Oh. You don't take firstborn children?"
"I am a witch of ancient promises, timeless dreams, and fresh blood.โ The Witch announced. โOf course I take firstborn children. It's just a bit weird that it was your first offer."
"I'm sorry, mistress. I don't know how this works. Was I supposed to start smaller and work my way up to the firstborn? Iโve always been hopeless at haggling." The man seemed on the verge of tears. "My wife passed a few years ago. She used to do all the business at market."
"If your wife passed a few years ago, how exactly do you plan to offer me your firstborn?" The witch swirled her tea and the steam made foul omens in the air. "I mean, sure, you don't have to be married to have kids, but it does usually help if you're not obviously still in mourning."
"Oh, my little Jackie is already born. They're five. My firstborn and, well, my only-born."
"Okay. If the kid has already been born, you don't have to say firstborn. You can just say 'my child, whose name is...' What's the kid's name again?"
โJackie.โ
โWell, youโve gone and put Jackie in a bit of a precarious spot. You see, now that youโve offered the child, the fatespring will hate it if I accept a lesser deal. So either I have to talk you into a bargain thatโs technically worse for you, or little Jackie comes to live with me. Now, I could-โ
โThatโs fine mistress. I accept the bargain.โ The man sniffled and wiped his tears. He looked weirdly relieved. โSo, do I bring Jackie here to you, or will you come to the farm to collect? Or is it one of those โleave them in a clearing at the full moonโ kind of-โ
โMy guy. What is up? What is your deal, exactly? Iโve had, like, five different firstborn deals this week. Thatโs weird, right? You get that? Thatโs normally the worst case scenario for yโall. But at least they hadnโt had the kids yet, so they could still fool themselves that they could wriggle out of the compact somehow. And they didnโt lead with โoh yeah, take my first child, thatโs a strong opening bargaining position!โ The canopy around them began to darken and the trees began to grow thorns. โAnd if thereโs one thing that really gets on my flat-ass witch tits, itโs when thereโs something going on I donโt understand. So what in the ever-boiling piss is up?โ
The trembling farmer forced out the words, โItโs, uh, itโs the levy, mistress.โ
โThe levy? What levy?โ
โThe king, mistress. Heโs put a levy out. He needs troops.โ
โWhy would he want a child to be pressed into military service?โ
โItโs the prophecy, mistress. A great foretelling came down from the Speaker of the Fates, or so the criers say. In 18 years, a great darkness will come. It will bring war and ruin to the kingdom. It will shatter the crown. So the king is demanding we send every child whoโll be over 16 when the omens come due. Theyโll get raised as warriors and heroes, so they say.โ The farmer looked up at the Witch, a hint of hope shining through the desperation that had cracked him. โOnly, none of us want to pay the kingโs fateprice with our kids. And Mrs Goodwhistle, she said that youโd probably give them a good life.ย
โOr, at leastโฆ youโd give them some kind of life.โ
The Witch said nothing for a long while.
Then she stood up.
โI guess Iโd better get a shift on then.โ The briar-bound cottage behind them pricked up its leaves like they were ears.ย
โYouโreโฆ youโre leaving?โ
โOh, donโt fret. Iโll take little Jackie with me. Iโll take all of them.โ The witchโs home unravelled, all its branches and brambles writhing down to follow its roots into the ground. โIf my hearth is going to become a daycare for all the poor little prophecy-pocked bairns of this land, Iโm going to need more space. And Iโll need to take them somewhere harder to findโฆโ
โOh, thank you, mistress!โ
The Witch flicked something to the farmer, who caught it instinctively. In his sweaty palm was a seed - though it was older, darker and heavier than normal.
โThereโs your harvest spell. Appropriate payment, as the scalekeepers demand. Each morning, when you go to bring in the harvest - look to the sky. When the sun is just tickling the horizon, reap a single ear of corn and put it aside. Whisper into it as if youโre talking to your child. Jackie will hear you. In the deepest part of winter, roast and eat that corn - then youโll get your reply.โ
โIโฆ I have no wordsโฆโ The farmerโs eyes and throat burned.
โNo need for them. The deal must be made and the price must be paid.โ The Witch held out a hand and a nearby tree bent its limbs down to meet her, offering a branch. โNow, I have much to prepare, so I will take my leave. The woods will see you home.โ
And the witch took the living branch from the tree and sat upon it like a broom, then rose into the sky like a sunrise.
---
18 years later, the Witch of Stolen Tomorrows returned to the kingdom. The earth trembled as her thorned fortress - a living wilderness - bore her onwards on a thousand root-wrought feet.
Standing atop the briar parapets was the Witchโs cadre of apprentices. They were all teens and twenty-somethings, clad in the colours of autumn skies and wielding the instruments of fate.
The king, far away in his keep, felt a strange shiver through the gold of his crown. An echo of its coming shattering.
The Witch hung from a giant thorn like a sailor from a bowsprit. In her free hand, she cradled a cup of tea.
โHere is a lesson about prophecies.โ She said it softly, but the rushing winds carried the words to her students. โIf you fight them, theyโll put you on like a jacket and wear you as a costume as they dance ruin through your life. But if you grab them by the scruff, then you can be the one wearing destiny as your cloak.
โAnd then you get to be the one writing the story.โย
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