the meaning of life? is to make your bedroom as comfy as possible. that's it that's the purpose
the secondary purpose is to equip your kitchen and get really really really into international cuisine
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
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@gulpinthegay
the meaning of life? is to make your bedroom as comfy as possible. that's it that's the purpose
the secondary purpose is to equip your kitchen and get really really really into international cuisine

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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first year in fandom: omg i love these characters.... and the story's so well written.... so much cool fanart and fic, i think i'm going to write some of my own
eleventh year in fandom: au where the character is a little jingle bell for sale on ebay for 8.99
this is the bell in question. btw
you won't believe the weather we've been getting [remembers to avoid giving away my location] the sky was turned to darkness and the moon to blood, and the stars fell from the heavens.

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got a new lighter. it’s shaped like a fish and it blinds you.
it had a huge sticker on it that said “this is not a toy”. the gas station i got it from had a sign infront of the display for these only that said “buy first, then test”. the first time you strike it (from the fins, by the way) you find out exactly why. they have added incredibly bright flashing blue LED lights on the eyes, which point directly into your eyes and the eyes of whoever is looking anywhere close to the fish that makes you blind.
a friend of mine was like “you can probably take this apart and cut the wires so it doesn’t do that anymore” and i told her “no i can’t. i can’t do that” and she was like “???why not?????????”
it’s just too fucking funny. this is the stupidest thing i own. thinking about that gas station clerk with like 50 more of these fucking things thinking “how the fuck am i gonna get rid of these?” makes me loose it. setting up the sign and i was literally the first person to buy one.
who thought this was a good idea.
I do not want the ai overview. I want to read six wikipedia pages as god intended.
Being the only bi cis guy amongst almost exclusively trans friends and peers is wild because in theory its like im living in a horny manga where all of a dudes friends turn into hot babes, but in reality they are hunting me like the last bison on the prairie. 5 years ago I mentioned bionicle and one of them asked when I was starting estrogen.
Wtf is a grungler
Youre fuxking kidding me Im being punked right??????
for OP's sake (because no one posted it yet), this word is a meme spawned from this tweet
friday the 13th leading into valentine's weekend is so crayzmazingly pussy popping I feel gothically horny just thinking about it
Assless chaps were the OG crotchless panties.
"All chaps are assless" ok well I get my money from the ATM machine. I have a hot water heater in my house and I put toast in my toaster.
all chaps are assless ‘til a cowboy’s in ‘em
Chaps (ass not included)

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Nancy and Robin giving each other book recommendations, leading to Erica asking what Robin is reading and telling her about it. Erica, interested, takes out the book from the library the next day.
El sees both Nancy and Robin reading the same book and asks about it - prompting Robin to give her the same spiel she gave Erica, and El wanting to be included gets it, too.
Now four of the girls are reading the same book and talking about it and Max is not about to miss out.
All of a sudden they're a book club. Robin and Nancy are out here recommending Anna Karenina, Erica and Max are recommending The Handmaids Tale and other dystopias and while El doesn't have any recommendations herself, she just loves being included and hearing the other girls thoughts.
super simple low-effort ao3 summary methods that are 1000% better and 1000% less annoying than just saying you suck at summaries:
copypaste the first few lines of the fic. u already wrote ‘em. let ‘em be their own damn hook
if ur feeling fancy & don’t mind showing ur hand a bit, copypaste the first few lines of the fic that u feel are esp. Important or Interesting - the ones where u first start getting into the real meat of things
state the main tropes! theyre probably already in ur tags - just say them again - maybe as a full sentence if ur feelin fancy. or with a joke if ur feelin Extra fancy
ask a question. pose a hypothetical. eg what happens if u take [character] and put them in [situation]?
make an equation. [character] + [thing] = [outcome]
just write like a one-sentence summary of what the fuck is going down. just one (1) sentence. doesnt matter if it doesn’t cover every important aspect. or if it sounds bland. any summary sentence is gonna be miles better than “idk i suck at summaries”
just…explain the fic like u would to a friend? it doesnt have to be a polished back of the book blurb. it can just be “[pairing] coffee shop au, but like, still with murder, and also i made everyone trans. enjoy”
just stick a meme in there
honestly who cares
just put literally anything but a self deprecating comment in there & ur golden
#it’s okay if you even have to spoil a little bit of the early plot twists#set the lure; cast the net [x]
here’s the thing. if you put a self-deprecating comment in the summary you have at least halved the chances of me deciding to read your story. because if you think you suck or you think your story sucks why should i spend my time with it? you told me it sucks. i’m taking you at your word. i only have so much time in my day and i’m trying to only read stuff i like.
so don’t do that.
almost any summary you can possibly come up with is better than readers seeing you calling your own work bad and deciding you must know best, after all, and not giving it a chance.
Yes yes. Yes. Do not tell me ahead of time that your work is poop actually. I will believe you.
Because, for one thing, I’m too old and tired and lacking in executive function to bolster anyone else’s ego. I am fully occupied with my own thanks.
Switching between these every day
lowk believe nancy would have never resisted robin in the library scene if they had all the time in the world. the one right after robin says "You'll never know" and then they proceed to engage in the most unbelievably homoerotic shared look ever.
she would have pounced on her????? i can feel nancy gripping the microfiche through this gif alone and holding back lots and lots of feminine urges such as but not limited to, "do i scold her or do i make out with her ... or both in that order?"
i just love this scene so much 😝😝😝 they're so
okay we NEED to put “camp” up on a shelf where people can’t reach it too because i just saw someone call the mario movie camp like girl what in the fresh hell are you talking about 😭
Anything else while I've got the ladder out?

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"they're not gay" I don't know man, I read a masterfully written fanfic on A03 that says otherwise.