People: What do you do for a living?
Me: What i want.
Oop
While acknowledging the truth of the original statement, sometimes itβs just cool to know what other people do. (I am a boring corporate drone, I am fascinated by people who arenβt.) That said, if you judge people as βless thanβ because of their job, youβre an asshole.
@elizabethgraves speaking the truth out here!!
I couldnβt agree more, you wouldnβt believe how often I get looked at like im trash cuz I work in the construction industry.
Somebody on medium had a very interesting take on this question. They werenβt being fully serious, but the take was interesting nonetheless. The article was called βHow to Be Politeβ:
Hereβs a polite personβs trick, one that has never failed me. I will share it with you because I like and respect you, and it is clear to me that youβll know how to apply it wisely: When you are at a party and are thrust into conversation with someone, see how long you can hold off before talking about what they do for a living. And when that painful lull arrives, be the master of it. I have come to revel in that agonizing first pause, because I know that I can push a conversation through. Just ask the other person what they do, and right after they tell you, say: βWow. That sounds hard.β
Because nearly everyone in the world believes their job to be difficult. I once went to a party and met a very beautiful woman whose job was to help celebrities wear Harry Winston jewelry. I could tell that she was disappointed to be introduced to this rumpled giant in an off-brand shirt, but when I told her that her job sounded difficult to me she brightened and spoke for 30 straight minutes about sapphires and Jessica Simpson. She kept touching me as she talked. I forgave her for that. I didnβt reveal a single detail about myself, including my name. Eventually someone pulled me back into the party. The celebrity jewelry coordinator smiled and grabbed my hand and said, βI like you!β She seemed so relieved to have unburdened herself. I counted it as a great accomplishment. Maybe a hundred times since Iβve said, βwow, that sounds hardβ to a stranger, always to great effect. I stay home with my kids and have no life left to me, so take this party trick, my gift to you.
I read an article recently that suggested we should stop asking people what they do for a living/for work/etc entirely, because thats a) abelist, to assume that everyone you speak to is still working, and b) puts the person in an awkward position if they are unable to work/are currently unemployed/have had to take time off work due to injury or illness/are retired/etc.
The article instead suggested that we should ask things like βand what do yoou spend your days doing?β Or something similar. This leaves the floor open for them to tell you what they do as a job, or, if they donβt work or donβt want to divulge what they do or donβt want to think about work for three minutes, they can tell you what they enjoy doing. What they spend their days doing when/if theyβre not at work.
It achieves the same thingβ it keeps the conversation going and it helps you get to know the other person a bit better, but it frames it more on their terms. They can tell you however much theyβre comfortable telling, without feeling pressured or boxed in.
βSo what do you get up to?β
