The royal Gizz

people will act like i must be absolutely miserable and seethingly angry all the time because i bicker with people on tumblr/reddit and i don't know how to be like. no this is me kicking back and relaxing actually

pop health science is so annoying bc it'll be like "did you know? eating strawberries will give you mega cancer" and you're like pfft whatever begone influencer. but sometimes then you'll see a reasonably credible article like "Study Shows Possible Link Between Strawberries and Mega Cancer" and you're not usually the type to follow that kind of thing religiously but idk maybe you should consider not eating strawberries? but then there's another article saying "Strawberry/Mega Cancer Study Debunked" and it turns out the original study had a sample size of 3 and was funded by Big Blueberry, and strawberries may have a small connection to mega cancer but only if you are genetically predisposed to mega cancer and eat 50 strawberries every day. so you return to your strawberry eating life. but whenever you eat strawberries in public someone tells you about the mega cancer.

take my ass to torture city where the grass is ouch and the girls are hit me

nope. funkytown again

come on

but if I were to say that I don’t think vampires inherently and universally represent queerness and that if that’s the only way you engage with any story containing a vampire then a lot of very important messages are going to go straight over your head? i would be killed to death.

ESPECIALLY an issue when vampires very explicitly represent fear of outsider immigrant non-white invaders! Dracula can absolutely be read with a queer lens but we cannot let our desire for ~spooky gay stuff~ blind us to the very real xenophobia, antisemitism, and orientalism present in a LOT of the foundational media in vampire history! nor the racism present in modern vampire stories!!!

they're making a Chris Hansen biopic with Robert Pattinson in it....

robert Pattinson voice: my hungry ass will eat just about anything

“Where are the trans men in history?” See. When you're born a gender that was forcefully married off, who had to live most of their life indoors, when you had to raise children, and had a lobotomy if your family thought you were a tad too odd, it's kinda hard to come out as a trans man now ain't it.

auto immune disorders happen when the immune system ignores regulatory factors and begins attacking healthy bodily tissues, due to what scientists refer to as "sheer love of the game"

Yeah man, this wizard sleepover is cozy. I just saw a guy gently clap his hands together and say "hot beverage conjuration" or something, and suddenly everyone was holding a perfect mug of their favorite warm drink in their hands. Nobody who was already sleeping even woke up, that's how cozy it is. I'm over here casting pillow and level 2 pyjamas. I think I just heard "power word: blanket fort" two groups over. I gotta get in there.