I'm a real person

wow can't believe the two celestial beings that needed around 6k years to start holding hands didn't make out in front of god and satan. wild.

what a beautiful time of year everyone is growing veegtables for me spacifically, one problem though you need to make fences shorter im sure its a mistake but i cant reach some of them

hello imptortant message from deer youyr doing it agen. i cant eet the vegbals you are growing for me like this

I hate it when you’re reading smut and you can’t figure out what position they’re in.

ITS BACK

the king has abruptly fired 60% of his wizard staff, so he’s about to be abruptly surprised at who floated 100% of his formerly floating sky castle

I heard they're planning to maintain their levitation rites with autonomous constructs from now on, saying wizards are going to be totally obsolete within the season... so, ah, I'd invest in falling island insurance.

As an aroace girly, I think people are placing too much importance on a kiss. It’s not needed when their relationship and bond does all the talking.

Oh I hate this so much, incredible job OP

Challenge: hear someone mention the name Sandokan without hearing that goddamn theme song play in your head. Challenge level: impossible.

[Image description: Screenshot that reads: St. Julian the Hospitaller is the patron saint of clowns and circus workers, innkeepers, fiddle players, jugglers, childless people, and murderers. End description.]

happy this guy's day, everybody

20 years ago, it was a scandal that Google started to track which links you clicked on the search-results page,

Oh, that's a little extra for a gingerbread cookie but for him fairly normYOU MOTHERFUCKER

^ This explains it so perfectly