A Garlic Bread Wanna Be

Bro your pussy is so nuanced today....

You pussy is gauche

why on god's green earth would you show this to your mother

we're white

queue this post when it’s your birthday and be surprise

we all have at least one friend who's always like I want a relationship <3 but they're living in some kind of shed on a mountain #ComeDownFromYourShed

the things you must do to find a relationship = know more than 3 people. and come down from your shed #YourShed #3People

if tumblr explodes you can address a letter to my url and place it in any hollow log. to be clear i will not receive it. but it is an action you can take

A FURBY WITH A HUMAN BUTT AND LEGS

imagine this sprinting towards you at 500 mph

as a child there's nothing cooler than a kid who gets subjected to evil experiments and gains special abilities. it's even cooler if these abilities also cause unfathomable suffering to use/against others. children love stories like this.

The children yearn to be Mewtwo

And yet it's still the same article, the article designated to be about theseus' ship. Debate solved i guess

easy as fuck . were they stupid?

one of the worst adult tasks is going to the bank

I do enjoy when a very old classic Tumblr post (like literally a decade old at this point) comes across my Dash and I click on OP's account and their last post was like, 30 minutes ago.

I DONT CARE HOW MANY BEDS THERE WERE. WHAT IS YOUR BOOK ABOUT

(tearfully) w- working at the mattress store

i'm so fucking sorry. can you ever forgive me