washed-up grade 9 catboy

IOUUIEEEIAIOEAEI

some of them want to amuse you 😺. some of them want to be amused 😸

girls love having a second boss phase

Are you currently suffering from The Character?

BEFORE you leave the hardware store with a huge 5 gallon shop vacuum you found on sale AND a mop with a longass handle ask yourself: did you bike here??

used bungie cords to secure both items in such a way that an old person walking by, looked at me, shook their head in pitying understanding and said, “i’ve been there. be careful out there, okay?”

im going to explode in the kiln

People always get so weird about my participation in the Flat Earth Advocacy Group. For the last time, we aren't cranks, we aren't conspiracy theorists, we're definitely not geocentrists, and our policy think tank is fully aware of what shape the planet currently is

Something a lot of pastiches of games like Disco Elysium and Slay the Princess fail to grasp is that you are allowed to have a maximum of one (1) skill/voice/whatever that's basically well adjusted. All of the others have to embody something that's fucked up about the protagonist, or else it doesn't work.

this is also how tumblr feeds work

i mean this from the bottom of my heart: no one is impressed by your loud ass car. actually we talked about it and we all want you dead.