Now a Mycroft Holmes thirst blog

Series

Undead Boys Detectives: Payneland with background Cryland, 5/? installments complete. Charles and Edwin return from Hell as living boys and have to deal with the consequences while hunting a dangerous spirit and dealing with their burgeoning feelings for each other.

Ministry of Supernatural Investigations: Payneland with eventual Palasaki, 6/? installments complete. An AU where Edwin and Charles are partners working for an agency that solves supernatural crimes and are pining like crazy for each other.

A Case for the Dead Girl Detectives: Palasaki and Payneland, 2/2 installments complete. A role reversal AU featuring Niko and Crystal as ghost detectives, Charles as a psychic, and Edwin as a student at Gray Wake who gets pulled into their orbit.

Cricket Bat Heart: Payneland, 2/? installments complete. An AU inspired by the book Swordheart by T. Kingfisher, where Charles has been bound to a magic cricket bat (that used to be a sword) for centuries when it falls into Edwin's hands.

Superhero Charles AU: Payneland w/ background Palasaki, 3/3 installments complete. An AU where Charles is a vigilante known as the Ghost and Edwin is the journalist oblivious to the fact that his best friend and the man who has saved his life multiple times are one and the same.

Standalones

Say her name like an elegy: Edwin & Crystal, T, 2K words. When Edwin finds Crystal distraught and reading a book on necromancy, it doesn’t take much detective work to figure out what’s wrong. Providing comfort is a much more challenging endeavor.

Like the slumber that creeps to me: Payneland, T, 13K words. While on a case, Charles falls victim to a cursed necklace that causes everyone who touches it to sicken and die. While his friends frantically search for a way to break the curse, a weakening Charles has plenty of time to think about his feelings for his best mate.

I will love you (I'll really love you): Payneland, T, 5K words. Five times Charles tries to tell Edwin that he's in love with him and one time he succeeds.

I Am Flesh And I Am Bone (I've Got Fire In My Soul): Payneland w/ background Palasaki, M, 11K. On Halloween, when the veil is thinnest between the living and the dead, ghosts are at their most corporeal—and their most vulnerable. When Charles, Crystal, and Niko go to a masquerade and walk into terrible danger, Edwin has no choice but to leave the safety of their warded office to save them.

Beneath the winter snow: Pre-Payneland, T, 2K. In the days before they leave St. Hilarion's and set out to start the Dead Boy Detective Agency, Edwin and Charles are just two boys playing in the snow.

it's hard to see me (at least you tried): Pre-Payneland, M, 10K. Charles and Edwin have been the Dead Boy Detectives for over a year, tracking down lost items and estranged loved ones, when they take on a new case that takes a terrifying turn. When an overwhelmed Edwin drives Charles away—possibly forever—with a thoughtless comment, he finds himself alone and in the kind of peril he thought he had left behind in Hell.

An Acquired Taste: Payneland, T, 3K. When Edwin ducks into a coffee shop to avoid an awkward run in with his ex-boyfriend, he meets Charles, a charming barista with a penchant for terrible latte art. Edwin can’t stand coffee, but that doesn’t stop him from returning again and again.

young blood (never get chained): Payneland with background Palasaki, E, 93K words. When half-demon university student Charles saves one of his classmates, Edwin, from being sacrificed to a demon, he inadvertently binds their souls together and makes a powerful enemy in Hell.

When I'm Gone (I'll Carry You Home): Gen, M, 22K. When Crystal begs Lilith to give her more time with Niko, the goddess grants her wish—by sending Crystal back to the moment before the Tongue & Tail explodes. Desperate to save her friends, Crystal lives through Esther’s attack again and again, trying to get all of them out unscathed.

Half in the Grave: Payneland, M, 77K words. An Edwin who returned from Hell mostly alive and a Charles who survived his brush with death in 1989 and went on to become an assistant at Tragic Mick's must work together to solve a string of murders in 1999.

Wedding Vows and Other Lies: Payneland, E, 109K words. When Edwin needs to get married in order to inherit his eccentric great-uncle's fortune, Charles naturally volunteers. After all, he'd do anything to help out his best mate. It'd be the perfect solution, if only Edwin weren't already madly in love with him. Updates weekly on Sundays.

heaven need a sinner (you can't raise hell with a saint): Payneland, E, 6K words. When Charles, a half-demon, interrupts one of his classmates being sacrificed to a demon, he only has a matter of minutes to stop Sa’al from claiming Edwin’s soul. The ritual calls for a virgin sacrifice, so Charles can only think of one solution: make sure Edwin isn’t a virgin by the time Sa’al arrives for his prize.

(not) so crazy in love: Crystal & Edwin, Payneland, and Palasaki, T, 6K words. When Charles and Niko are caught up in a sorcerer’s love spell, Crystal and Edwin have to save them. But in order to fit in with the besotted couples surrounding them, they need to pretend to be madly in love while they do it. After this, breaking the spell is going to be easy.

A Little Push: Payneland, T, 6K words. After watching Charles react with jealousy to a client flirting with Edwin, Niko gets a brilliant idea: she and Edwin will pretend to date. That will definitely make Charles realize his feelings for Edwin, right?

Of Mistletoe and Meddling: Payneland, T, 5K words. The Dead Boy Detective Agency—including Crystal, Niko, and Jenny—are invited to the Lost and Found Department’s annual solstice party. Inexplicably, Edwin finds himself stalked by mistletoe.

Mandatory Bonding: Night Nurse & Edwin, T, 6K words. When Night Nurse and Edwin are captured by a demon that plans to snuff them out of existence, it's hard to tell what's the bigger inconvenience: imminent annihilation or being locked in a warded cell together.

Charles rockets out of bed, kicking away the sheets that tangle around his legs. The woman is still talking, but he can’t hear what she’s saying over the pounding of his heartbeat in his ears. Stumbling into his kitchen, he snatches the phone off the wall in a white-knuckled grip. “Hello?”

“Charles Rowland?” She sounds perfectly calm, like she isn’t calling from the bloody hospital of all places.

“That’s me,” Charles manages to say, even though he feels like his heart is lodged in his throat. His mum promised that things were better with his dad since he retired, that Paul Rowland is a changed man now, but Charles never really believed it. But if his dad has finally landed her in the hospital, Charles… well, he doesn’t know what he’s going to do. He can’t make her leave the old cunt; he’s tried and failed more times than he can count.

“I’m calling from St. Vincent’s Hospital on behalf of Edwin Payne,” Vera says. “He gave your name as his emergency contact.”

Charles’s half-asleep brain can’t quite comprehend the words, confusion overtaking the previous terror. For a moment, he wonders if he’s dreaming, if his sleeping mind thinks it’s 1993 and that he and Edwin are still best mates. “Edwin? Edwin Payne? Brown hair, green eyes, mole on his chin?”

“Dimples,” he doesn't add. “And beautiful hands and a smile that makes you want to do anything to get another one out of him.”

He can practically feel Vera’s judgment over the line. “Edwin Anthony Payne,” she says slowly. “Date of birth January 18th, 1973.”

Charles remembers Edwin’s twentieth birthday, the last one they celebrated together three and a half years ago. Edwin and Simon had just broken up for what really seemed like the last time, and Charles had been trying to hide how thrilled he was, because Edwin seemed properly miserable. Charles, Crystal, and Niko surprised him with a nice dinner and a lopsided cake that Charles and Niko made from scratch. It’d been a good night and by the end of it, Edwin was smiling, leaning back in his chair with a glass of wine, cheeks flushed and eyes bright.

And then…

Well, it didn’t matter, did it? Apparently, it had never mattered. Edwin and Simon got back together a month later and not long after that, Charles and Edwin had the blowup that ended over five years of friendship in one horrible night.

“He was admitted here this morning.” Vera’s voice cuts through his reverie. “He’s asked for you.”

Finally, it sinks in that it’s a hospital that’s calling about Edwin. Edwin is in the bloody hospital. “What happened?” Charles demands.

“I’m afraid I can’t share many details over the phone,” Vera says. “But there's been an accident and he’s in surgery now.”

An accident. Surgery.Bloody hell, Edwin hates hospitals. He hates fluorescent lights, loud noises, and people he doesn’t know touching him, and all three of those things are unavoidable in hospitals. The thought of him alone there makes Charles’s heart hurt. And he must be alone, because there’s no way he would have asked them to call Charles otherwise.

Maybe he hit his head. Maybe he’s delirious. Maybe he’ll be furious when he gets out of surgery and finds Charles waiting for him. Maybe Charles should tell Vera sorry and hang up, because this isn’t really his problem. Edwin doesn’t want it to be Charles’s problem. But Edwin asked for Charles, and even if he didn’t really mean it, Charles has never been able to say no to him, not since their first day back at St. Hil’s.

“I’ll be right there,” Charles tells Vera.

***