queen of the north
Not today Justin
Sweet Seals For You, Always
noise dept.
Claire Keane

roma★
Misplaced Lens Cap
hello vonnie
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
$LAYYYTER

almost home
Keni

Love Begins
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year

tannertan36
i don't do bad sauce passes
taylor price

Janaina Medeiros
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open


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@gameoflesbians
queen of the north

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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you know what’s probably more fun than playing chess? cheating at chess
“ohhh would you look at that, my pawns found jesus and now they’re all bishops”
“so i realize it looks like i’m putting a thimble on the board but actually my rooks have been using their downtime to build another rook, one that’s better, stronger, faster—”
“hey welcome back. while you left to get a snack, those six pieces you’d captured slipped their guards, tunneled to safety and emerged right in the middle of your royal palace.”
“oof, looks like you’ve got my king cornered…maybe this is a good time to mention that shortly before we started playing, my pawns and knights revolted and instituted a representative democracy. feel free to kill the puppet ruler that was the one remaining vestige of our tyranny, you cringing servant of the crown. vive la revolution!”
New game: Cheating Chess, where you can make up any new thing you want, as long as you can justify it, as in the above examples, by a plausible mechanism
“Sorry, your kingdom experienced a debilitating outbreak of plague and now your defenses are shattered, leaving the board open for my rampaging forces. Checkmate.”
My hero.
#iconic
“The Twin Cities” sounds like a destination in a high fantasy novel that you can only reach by climbing a mountain and solving a dragon’s riddle but instead they’re in Minnesota

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Me in history class: Wow, humanity has been through some fascinating times! I wonder if I’ll ever live through major historical events!
Me now: NO NO NO NO NO I WANT TO GET OFF THIS RIDE
it was supposed to be space travel. it was supposed to be space travel. it was supposed to be space travel. it was supposed to be space travel. it was supposed to be space tr
space travel it was supposed to be space travel it was supposed to
A Good Old-Fashioned Midwestern Apocalypse
You all, fools: *getting tattoos based on the ancient tattoos they find on bog mummies and the other ancient dead that for all you know will bind you to a forgotten god that now by all rights has a claim on your life for better or for worse*
Me, and intellectual: *doesnt fucking do that*
A forgotten god cannot run my life any worse than I am currently running it myself.
Bog mummy take the wheel
like! people always reference pride & prejudice as the archetypal “normal girl falls for mysterious brooding antihero” story but they overlook the part where lizzy drags darcy so fucking hard he leaves town and then apologizes for talking to her the next time they meet even though they’re at his literal house

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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SCREAMIN
me: *worries that I’m Evil and Manipulative and tries very hard every day to be a good person*
me: oh my god
me: I’m manipulating people into thinking I’m good
the cold culture in the north is real. some days i worry about wearing my parka because i think it isnt cold enough to justify it and people will judge me for it, and honestly i only end up needing it half the time anyway since my body is acclimated to the cold. i live in a god damn snowglobe. that frozen bitch has a castle next door. i wear a fleece when its 20 degrees out, determined to outlast every underdressed man, the burning desire to emasculate them warming my body. i have the bodily composition of a polar bear and was born to endure this weather. winter is a competition and i am winning
happy birthday to a very special and powerful deity…. baby grinch…
my parents……..Were Right
if you get home at night after work and discover that the able-bodied quasi-adults who were at home doing nothing but watch netflix all day have not even thought about making dinner or feeding the dogs or taking out the trash or emptying the dishwasher and have left it all for you to deal with then you’re allowed to be Less Than Happy

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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12 y/o me: *walks into a new friend’s house*
friend: you can leave your shoes on
friend’s mom: you can call me by my first name
12 y/o me: thank you both but physically i cannot do that
i’m so bad at remembering the average age for baby milestones like someone will be like “she’s 18 months (:” and i’ll be like “right what can she…… do? teeth? are there teeth?”
“stats?”