i was worried your boss hates drugs. no hay porno

I love that opera sits in this limbo where it's extremely well-known but not really beyond a surface level recognition, so you get commercials for makeup or whatever to the tune of the I Hate Women So Much It's Unreal aria

big fan of whatever the youth is doing to torment scientology buildings

This is the funniest thing ever, everyone else go home

it really is fucking pathetic that a country with more guns than people can't hit one guy

if this is how you found out there was an active shooter at the White House yesterday I'm sorry

Me: oh it's this post again. Wait. Why does it say "posted 37 minutes ago"

prayer to whichever dead catholic person is most appropriate: may I not have to run a whole week of surprise camps on crutches. in a knee brace.

Im agnostic raised liberal protestant, but absolutely the catholics got saints right. Sometimes your problem is so fucking specific you need Some Guy. If you're listening, Guy of Workers Who Have Strain Injuries,

what the dog doin

socks are the primary producers of the laundry biome. they typically mate for life and come in a wide variety of patterns, though—unlike shoes, which many theorize to be a symbiotic species—they lack sexual dimorphism. juvenile socks resemble their parents, but have yet to develop the long necks that distinguish socks from other species of the extremity family, such as mittens

the lint trap is a fascinating example of a decomposer. it relies on the environment to bring food in the form of detritus, which it then breaks down into lint. lint traps have relatively long lives in comparison with other species (especially given the recent downward trends in lifespan, which are likely caused by a combination of genetic bottlenecks and poor nutrition). the lint trap has an unusual relationship with fire—some theorize that it uses fire as a tool to increase resource availability, while others believe that its frequent proximity to fire is due to environmental factors

the apex predator of the laundry biome is, of course, the dreaded duvet cover. duvet covers lead solitary lives, and are rarely seen socializing with one another. its preferred prey is socks, although it is an opportunistic eater and will prey upon much larger targets, such as t-shirts, leggings, and even sheets. aside from its large territory and antisocial nature, its behaviors are poorly known and highly controversial. one major theory is that the duvet cover is an ambush predator, lying in wait for its prey. another is that the duvet cover seeks out prey, using its superior size and large mouth to overwhelm its victims in a matter of seconds. a third, less popular supposition is that the duvet cover lures its victims to it by mimicking the laundry bag, a preferred shelter for many residents of the laundry biome. more research on this topic is necessary

towels are unique members of the laundry biome. in many habitats, they live in isolation, either singly or in small groups. in others, they mingle with other inhabitants freely. in these latter areas, they serve a unique role in the ecosystem: water retention. even during dry spells, towels are capable of retaining water at unprecedented levels. they are then able to redistribute this water amongst their neighbors, in what some call an early example of interspecies cooperation.

"perfec t size put baby in Pelican Mouth" gained a new level of visceral horror once i found out how BIG those fuckers can actually get

"google ai" "spotify ai dj" "ai assistant" "enhanced by ai" what if i just start beating people over the head with a rock