I cant stop laughing š
the music when the girl jumps has me dead

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I cant stop laughing š
the music when the girl jumps has me dead

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never. stop. betting.
Iāve been chucking some old junk from my basement. I think Iāve upset the entity in the house. Lots of unexplainable falling items, burnt out light fixtures in the basement. Iāve explained to the entity why I need to clean house but stuff is still happening. Can I do anything else ?
āListen, bitch, either cool your tits or Iām evicting your incorporeal ass.āĀ
*Me, holding my incense burner and a bag of frankincense and cedar tips and waving them at the basement threateningly* āListen you little shit Iām not taking guff from a spirit, shape up or I will have your ass out of here before you can say āHel please come collect one delinquent spirit pleaseā, donāt think I wonāt.ā
*Me, brandishing the cat* āIf I have to call on Ra and get you banished from this plain for all eternity, I WILL. /Do not test me on this./ā
Yes, exactly.Ā
Basically, let that little fucker know that it is on thin fuckin ice and you aināt taking no backtalk from a fuckin spiritās freeloading ass since when has it paid a bit of rent to live in your fuckin house.Ā
But also, if you can come to an agreement, I have lost far fewer things since I made friends with my house spirit-it can be relied on for help finding things in exchange for a bit of whatever I happen to be cooking. Of course, it took threatening it will a sword to get it to stop making unauthorized noises, but thatās another story
Putting the fear of You into its incorporeal heart sometimes works a treat.Ā
Mineās stopped hiding shit since I did that.Ā
Step one: scare the fuck out of the little fuck. (My favorite is going down there with sage & a broom and having Stern Words)
Step two: bribeĀ āem (shot of vodka works grand)
Step three: never lose your keys again.
I love how the advice of every witch here is the same, and can be summed up asĀ āWe canāt be having with that.āĀ
Spirit: does something fucky
Me: what did I *just* say? Do you want to be banished? This is how you get banished.
Spirit: suddenly very helpful
We are all Granny Weatherwax and I love that.Ā
@romparsons the instructions on how to stop something from hiding your shit are right there.Ā
YOU PUT THE FEAR OF YOU INTO IT.Ā
listen i might be drunk but im right. art & literature & nature & music make life worth living. people who look like they were ripped out of a caravaggio painting make life worth living. go organize a bacchanal in the woods. take pics of your lover in your hotel room in venice. who cares if thereās a void in your soul. who cares if you canāt get attached to anyone. neither can michelangeloās david.
these are the first nekonaughey comics i ever saw and they are still the most relatable [original source] [translation source]

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This is a bold faced LIE and you know it Bill
Itās kind of sad to me thatĀ āBechdel testā has become so mainstream in media that itās completely divorced from its original meaning and intent. Most of the women who talk about their fave romcomsĀ āpassing the Bechdel testā wouldnāt be caught dead reading a comic called Dykes to Watch Out For.Ā
The point of the Bechdel test, isnāt just that two named women have a conversation that isnāt about a man, itās about seeing representation for women in media that isnāt just based around relationships with men or objectification by men. Itās part of a conversation between two lesbians, women who donāt see themselves reflected in mainstream media.Ā
The point of the āBechdel testā is that itās a very low, extremely low standard to judge a movie by, but most donāt even pass those qualifications. So to say that anythingĀ āpasses the Bechdel test with flying coloursā is completely missing the point.Ā
general plot of every Thor film so far:
space prince Thor Odinson has a really bad fuckin time. somehow continues to be a pure ray of sunshine.
If Thor were summed up in a meme, he would be this one.
thatās actual thor 1 footage

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A reminder that this scene exists
Emma is like: āCmon pretty girl, two minutes and weā re out of this shit.
Regina is like: Is she really saving me or she just wants to put me at the center of the building while itās burning?
Do you think itās appropriate to ask if they can feel the fire?
Heard some important information on Twitter today, and thought Iād post it here for anyone who may not have heard it. This is actually a thing, devised by human rights organisation called Karma Nirvana.
Reblog to save a life?
A high school romance!!! After school makeover episodeā¦what will happen next??
5, 6, 7, 8, donāt assume these kids are straight (part 1)
WORKING CLASS SOLIDARITY
My dad told me recently that the most important public health workers are garbage collectors and janitors. So much of our health relies on a clean environment. These people do some of the most important work in society. If we learned in dirty public environments full of garbage, weād all be sick. I cannot thank these people enough for the valuable work that they do.
Shout out to all garbage collectors, janitors and housekeepers!

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u know what i miss? all the bro posts
bro one *over the phone*: bro i miss those bro posts bro two: not as much as i miss your eyes bro bro one: bro
Best thing Iāve heard all day
āLike 2003 Evanescence?ā She knew EXACTLY what to do.