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i wish i was a strawberry and not a person goodnight

I think Megan thee stallion should be allowed to execute people if she wants to

We should start making men balance a ball on their nose like a sea lions do 🤤📈

time spent loving will never be time wasted. even if that love ends. i have to believe this or i will go crazy. signed by. girl

Always bear in mind that there is absolutely no legitimate evidence that Luigi was actually the one who killed the insurance company guy.

Of course he wasn't. He was at a party with me that day.

"I'm sure about you" is a love language.

Use your PTO

Imagine the level of whimsy I could reach if I just had $5M in my bank account rn

I had a dream recently that I was getting all of my ingredients ready to make a delicious vegetable soup while the broth was being warmed on the stove on low. When I came back, there were TWO small capybaras in my soup pot bathing in the broth. In the dream, I was infuriated. But it’s a very cute image and someone should draw it.