official twilight trash

The idea is a) she was born for it so it comes naturally (but why would denying herself come naturally when it's against vampiric instinct??) and b) she 'braced herself' or mentally prepared and decided ahead of time she was going to be a vegetarian and that focus carried her through.

Which, like . . okay . . . to a degree. She did have more forewarning and knowledge than the others. But BEAU is also very controlled and didn't have nearly as much time to "mentally prepare."

And the thing that bothers me here is the idea that she is just SO committed to the vegetarian thing, she's already decided pre-vampirism to do it, because, well, she doesn't seem to be in the actual text? She asks both Edward and Carlisle why they bother trying to not eat people.

"In the beginning, though," I pressed while [Carlisle] taped another long piece of gauze securely in place, sealing it to my skin. "Why did you even think to try a different way than the obvious one?" His lips turned up in a private smile. "Hasn't Edward told you this story?" "Yes. But I'm trying to understand what you were thinking…" His face was suddenly serious again, and I wondered if his thoughts had gone to the same place that mine had. Wondering what I would be thinking when—I refused to think if—it was me.

You'd think the girl who was so innately good and pre-committed to vegetarian vampirism would understand what he was thinking? Instead she's like, "okay but like why not just eat people? Seems easier." She's very understanding of Edward's desire for her blood, for Jasper's slip up. She's like "yeah I get it, no hard feelings."

There is an inherent tension, IMO, between the "good with weird/born to be a vampire" stuff and the super self control stuff. She should be able to shrug off vampire horror because it seems normal to her OR she should be good at controlling her thirst, not both? The three most controlled Cullens--Carlisle, Rosalie and Edward-- are also the three that kind of hate being a vampire. Rosalie and Edward are vocal about it; Carlisle has coped by literally creating a new way of being a vampire and becoming a doctor to help humans rather than eat them. It makes sense THEY are controlled because they are on some level rejecting their vampirism. But Bella loves it, embraces, revels in it. But is someone also good at denying it?

TBH I've always assumed part of Jasper's struggles with self-control is that his heart is not in it. He does it because he hates feeling the emotions of his victims, he does it because he knows Alice needs what the Cullens can give her, but I don't think he really thinks killing humans is bad for a vampire to do. It's natural. It's a shark being a shark, a lion being a lion. And pre-vampire Bella seems to have a similar view. Like she's glad these specific vampires don't want to eat her but she gets why vampires generally would. But then she becomes a vampire herself and is the best at not eating people right away?

Claudia de Lioncourt de Point du Lac (Finds Grace)

Claudia swallows. “I’m not a prostitute. Louis—he adopted me, when my parents left and the rooming-house burned down.”

Grace startles. At the admission of death or the admission of adoption, she can't be sure. If Grace knows Louis' true nature, of his relationship with Lestat, then she must have predicted that her brother would never have a child.

Claudia looks at Grace and she sees what she could have been and what she will never be able to be, all because of her Turning, all because of her death and her rebirth, and Grace looks at Claudia, who is dressed nicely, a young girl who is putting flowers on her brother's grave, and Claudia sees the moment that Grace registers the reflection.

Then—Grace winces. “My brother’s daughter,” she says, voice quiet, voice contemplative, voice regretful, and she manages to make the title sound like more than Louis or Lestat ever has.

Her mother died. Her father ran off. Her adoptive parents let her burn.

Claudia is cursed to a half-existence forever because Louis missed the woman in front of her so much that he wanted to replace her. 

But when Grace says my brother's daughter, some part of Claudia thinks I am both of their daughter, I've got Lestat's hunger and Louis' ache, and Grace just sees the parts of me that are human.

-aletterinthenameofsanity, nobody taught her it takes a lot of water (to wash away New Orleans)

ASSAD ZAMAN as THE VAMPIRE ARMAND

THE VAMPIRE LESTAT | 3.03 | “Toronto”

He left him to die. Daniel is dead now.

That whole vampirism thing that Louis has been struggling with for so long? Now Daniel is stuck with it too and despite what he claims, he’s obviously not handling it well. Louis left a man with a progressive neurological condition and no ability to defend himself in the company of a very angry vampire who had every reason to kill him. And he did.

It doesn’t matter if he warned Armand. Louis even says himself that he shouldn’t have left Daniel alone with him, but that’s probably of little comfort to Daniel. And if comments from the cast are anything to go by, it sounds like the transformation was violent.

Yeah this has never bothered me as much as it seems to bother some people. Like you said, they were unconscious or unresponsive. It's not like he asked them and they said no and he did it anyway, he couldn't ask them. They couldn't answer. And he's a doctor. His job is literally to keep people alive. Like yes vampirism is radical procedure but it's a tool he has in his medical bag (right next to the magic drugs that make you instantly pass out apparently).

Like YES there is hypocrisy there and moral and ethical issues but like THAT's vampirism! That's the point! (and again: the instant bliss of Breaking Dawn makes all the hand-wringing about the monstrosity of vampirism seem pretty overblown anyway). And sure it was selfish in the sense that he was lonely but IDK by that point he had been alone for literally centuries. He held out for a long time. And to be honest the Edward turning is the one that bothers me the least because it arguably has the closest thing to consent: parental consent. Like, sure, Elizabeth Masen didn't know exactly what she was asking for but she sure seemed to know something supernatural was afoot: what others cannot do you must do for my Edward. I really can't fault Carlisle too much for honoring a dying mother's wish.

Oh he's a hypocrite because he didn't want to be a vampire himself. Sure! But again, that's like the point of vampire stories?! You have to make moral compromises all over the place. You do things you wouldn't do under non-supernatural circumstances. The fact that he held out so long before making a companion and did so under such specific circumstances (young person on the cusp of death whose mother was begging a doctor to save his life by any means possible) and he's still worried it was the wrong thing to do is compelling to me. It's not like he's running around turning all these people and is 100% convinced he was right. He knows he might have screwed up and lives with that.

Also, and this keeps coming up, but it's only the New Moon movie that suggests he thinks they're all damned. In the books (and the extended version of that stitches scene in the movie) it's clear that Carlisle doesn't think that. He thinks, or at least hopes, they are not inherently damned to Hell for being vampires, that they still have souls, that they can "get some measure of credit for trying." Maybe if he DID believe they were inherently evil and doomed like Edward did, he wouldn't have turned anyone.

It's interesting that this guy who tries to be 'good' and stick to his morals did this. I don't think it's out of character or un-compassionate but kind of the dark side of wanting to help--sometimes the helping IS the wrong thing to do and it's better to let nature take its course. And he has learned this lesson. Presumably, as a doctor, he's encountered plenty of other dying people since 1935 and he hasn't turned any of them.

"WHY DO I HAVE TO FEEL"

#2 is Louis bidding in the auction with a response to the reddit post that reads: "I'd like to have sex one more time with my wife who passed away. My body yearms for hers. The ultimate downside of finding "the one" is she may die young and leave you wanting."