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if I could’ve added one gravity falls episode, I’d of added a house of leaves one. It would’ve worked so good. I’ve said this before.
I know the target audience wouldn’t understand it, but like 10 years later, amphibia got to have a Midsommar episode. So I see no reason why Gravity Falls shouldn’t’ve Gotten a House of Leaves episode.
here is my concept.
(2nd half of season 1)
Dipper got lost going to the bathroom. He swears to Mabel that the bathroom moved. Mabel isn’t sure, but she sure has noticed that the Shack is weird. So Dipper and Mabel set out to make a map of the mystery shack (classic Boredom activity. Mabel adds glitter).
that’s when dipper notices it. The Quarter Inch. The mystery shack is a quarter inch bigger inside than it is outside. This drives dipper insane. He and Mabel take it to Stan. Stan doesn’t care — it’s not enough for the Tourists to notice. So dipper and Mabel bring Soos and Wendy along to investigate themselves.
they eventually realise that the shack seems to have generated an extra room. Soos makes a joke about it being his new break room. It’s a dark dark hallway, that goes much farther than reasonable.
Stan sees this as the perfect new Tourist Attraction. The 16 minute hallway! However, he bans Dipper and Mabel from it (he is scared it might reveal the basement). Dipper is FUMING. Mabel thinks the hallway is creepy anyway, but when dipper decides that he is going to explore it in the middle of the night, of COURSE she joins him! So they sneak in (with Waddles), get lost. Of course, Stan doesn’t notice for a while (sleep deprivation).
the twins go through horror shenanigans, walking down a staircase, until they discover that the hallway shifting house is actually a result of these strange magic creatures. Likr shoe elves, but for houses. They’ve infested the mystery shack and are constantly rebuilding the different hallways. That endless hallway? It’s cus they’ve been building it out as people explored it. Also they’re REALLY ugly. Like SUPER ugly. Like something ran them over and gave them rabies.
Mabel convinced the ugly elves to move out of the shack and make escape rooms instead. Cue montage of dipper and Mabel helping these ugly little guys to set up a legal business in gravity falls. The escape room is a hit! And all of the weird mystery shack shape shifting is reverted back to normal, just as Stan is about to show the hallway to the tourists.
Stan crashes out at the disappearing hallway. The tourists demand refunds. Stan runs off with their money.
dipper and Mabel return home, and Mabel decides to actually measure out the shack.
somehow though, it’s still a quarter inch bigger on the inside…
She tears up the map, declaring that Maths is stupid anyway!
I imagine the Mystery Shack is like the house from House of Leaves
seems normal, except the geometry doesn’t make sense, and the more you think about it, the more the house pulls you in and drives you insane.
except, with the mystery shack, the insanity it pulls you towards is the INSANE SAVINGS TO BE FOUND AT THE GIFT SHOP! NOW ONLY $100!
Stan wouldn’t even notice. Oh, there’s a room here that wasn’t here before? Guess that makes sense. There are more windows inside than outside? Saves on the Electricity Bill he doesn’t pay! The strange incomprehensible pull one feels to find out about and become one with the house? Maybe that’s just what owning a home is like.
dipper brings it up one day, only to be met with a noncommittal shrug from Stan
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I can't believe this is how I'm finding out that I got a scam forklift cert.
I took the cargo ops class at school but my teacher explained that it doesn't give a certification and I'd only be okay for ship's crane and the school forklifts. she said I could take an online exam and get my cert. I paid 60 bucks.
I'm googling and I'm seeing a lot of resources saying that the online programs cover the classroom part of the exam but not the in person practical aspect.
the back of the card even had fancy numbers on it. I couldn't have known that this isn't the one. this website sounded more official than certifyme.net, and there wasn't one with a .gov address.
so, I emailed OSHA, and they said that so long as I live and work in California, there's no such thing as forklift certification. I have to be told how to do it every time I get the job.
Update: I took a certification class in shipboard Material Handling Equipment at my federal job. *now* I'm forklift certified, but only on ships and piers and only for this company, but also rated to forklift explosives and hazardous materials. Also I'm a woman now.
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It's a shame that porn games and sim games don't have a lot of present overlap, because I feel like "horny mechsplo game where you have to actually win the fights to get to the sexy bits and it's one of those hyper-detailed 1990s era mech piloting sims that uses every single key on the keyboard" would do numbers with a very particular audience.
I'm not, but @kitsunestudios evidently is; while that's of course a completely different thing from what I'm describing, I'm not gonna lie, a sex simulator that controls like MechWarrior 2 is a fascinating prospect.
Please don’t let fandom ruin something you love. Walk away and unfollow the fans and enjoy the thing by yourself, or find a limited circle of people who ignore the discourse, or get your irl friends into the thing and collectively ignore the Internet community, or blacklist from here to the moon if you need to and only ever scroll through your rarepair ship’s tag on AO3. But don’t let fandom distort a show or a movie or a book or a comic you used to love so badly that you can’t enjoy the original anymore. Please. It isn’t worth it.
Sorry, my what? My pronouns? Oh, yeah I'm between genders at the moment. No, it's cool, I quit my last gender a little while ago because it really wasn't working out. I don't know if I even have a dream gender anymore.
Oh yeah, it did come with benefits, but they weren't really worth it. The culture was really toxic. To be honest I think I'd prefer a part-time gender so I can just be self-described in my spare time.
I mean, in a perfect world we wouldn't need gender, you know? We could just voluntarily be perceived as much as we're able, as much as makes us feel fulfilled. Having a full-time gender shouldn't be a prerequisite for food, shelter, and healthcare.
I bring a real 'actually people who are pregnant do deserve some special consideration because they are effectively at least temporarily disabled if not permanently after some complications' vibe to the party that a lot of people don't seem to like
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fiddlestanwichhhh polycule, #sfw, and inspired by this poast (link). specific era is post-canon🙂↕️. in mymind theyre all sitting in mcguckets bigass mansion and enjoying retirement.🥹🫰
also i havent written in forever and its 3am and i just Did all this . in one sitting. briefly possessed by the writing gods idk.
"You know," Stan says quietly, cutting into the peaceful silence of breakfast. "If ya think about it, me and McGucket are your sugar daddies, Ford."
McGucket snorts loudly and slaps his hand over his eyes, shaking quietly with laughter.
Ford chokes on his drink, a little bit of coffee running down his lip as he convulses with coughs. He spits back into the mug and sets it down, then coughs harshly into the crook of his elbow.
"Christ, don't die on me now!" Stan exclaims.
Fiddleford lets out a hiccup of a giggle. "Stanley Pines," he says.
"That's my name, don't wear it out."
Before Fiddleford can respond, Ford recovers and lowers his arm, inhaling shakily. His face has gone rosy-pink.
(Six-fingered hands come up for just a moment to fidget with the ring on his necklace; the one that matches Fiddleford's.)
"Excuse me?" Ford demands.
"You're excused," Stan replies easily, folding his hands behind his head and leaning back into his chair. The grin on his face could win in a shit-eating contest.
McGucket can't help but burst into quiet giggles as Ford splutters.
"Wh- no, you can't just- that's not even true! I mean- I- it..." he trails off, becoming lost in thought -- but not for long. A look of flustered horror rains down on his face.
"Oh, my god," Ford squeaks. "Why would you make me aware of this..."
Fiddleford wheezes and leans over to Stan, resting the side of his head against his shoulder. His hands rest lightly on Stan's chest, gripping loosely onto the fabric of his shirt.
"To see the look on yer face," Stan chuckles. He tilts his head down for a moment to press a chaste kiss to the top of Fiddleford's head. "And hey, I thought it was pretty obvious. Ain't I the shinin' image of a sugar daddy?"
He spreads his hands as he says it, displaying himself. Though he's careful to not smack McGucket -- instead, that arm just wraps around the giggling man's frail shoulders.
Indeed, the gesture makes Stan's attire and accessories all the more obvious. Golden chain, a ring on each ring finger, a golden watch... hell, even the buttons on his hawaiian shirt seems a little shiny.
"Y-you gotta admit, he's not too- too wrong 'bout that," McGucket manages, wiping a stray tear from his eye with a little sigh. "Ooh, boy, that got me good..."
"Both of you, shut up," Ford protests, covering his hot face with both hands.
(Stan takes a moment to look at the ring on his brother's hand, unable to keep his smile from softening as he stares at the one matching his right-handed ring.)
"Or what?" Stan teases, gradually lowering his voice to a purr. "You know you like it. Don't worry, sweetheart, we'll take care of you. Can get'cha anything ya need..."
Ford squirms, uncovering his pouting face. "W-well, I would like a coffee after you make me spit mine back out, thank you."
McGucket cackles and has to take another moment to catch his breath. "Y'all are killin' me over here. How'm I supposed to treat my precious darling Ford over here right if I kick the bucket too early?"
Stan barks out a laugh, turning into a wheeze as Ford responds by groaning loudly and smushing his blushing face into the tabletop.
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