fuuuck accidentally mixed up dowsing rods and sounding rods and now my pepeneus can detect freshwater springs
"omg baby i'm so wet"
i know

@theartofmadeline
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@flikkerij
fuuuck accidentally mixed up dowsing rods and sounding rods and now my pepeneus can detect freshwater springs
"omg baby i'm so wet"
i know

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GLaDOS voice: "Would you like to see some artwork I generated? I've heard from other test subjects that AI-generated artwork produces an uncanny valley response in human viewers because they can't perceive it as fully real. They've told me that it looks absolutely hideous to them, that they can't imagine anything more disgusting than AI art. But, well I've been practicing and wanted your honest opinion. Feel free to let me know how ugly you find this by ranking it on a scale from 'vomit-inducing' to 'eye-bleeding'." A robotic arm lowers from the ceiling holding a hand mirror up to Chell's face
infinite handcuffs hack
>#I love how this gag would be funny at any point since the third century BCE
Outdoor in sun perfec t place for president to do speech! Outdoor very warm very soft put old man on green lawn under sun. Put old man in warm sun. no problem ever in warm sun because good view and audience can see long speech. Nice podium outdoor sunny perfect place for old president can trust warm sun to give nice view to President good luck to President. friend sun.

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Everyone go look up the song nasa banned from space
Don't forget to play it loud as fuck
please….listen to the whole thing. And imagine that you are IN SPACE in 1973 and you JUST woke up. Every time you adjust…it escalates somehow.
This song had to be designed in a lab for the sole purpose of fucking with astronauts. whoever added it to the NASA playlist was a genius.
It took them two tries to ban it?
nooo tbe cigarete got gender dyspjoria :(((((((
shes gonna get on herbal replacement therapy i believe in her
i love declining birth rates 🥰 "what a horrible problem! society will collapse!" oopsie it looks like you're gonna have to make having children worth it 😊 teehee you're gonna have to improve society in order to fix this problem, or it will all collapse. oh noooooo. how horrible. :3c
who up in a kafka-esque rut sleep deprived, casually malnourished, socially awkward, painfully self-conscious, struggling financially, lacking community, altogether anhedonic
the shame of making a connection irl and them being like omg can i have your insta??? snapchat????? and having to be like sorry i live in a gap between two tree roots youre just going to have to normal text me like some kind of animal

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RIP to the legend
This goose fucking rocks and had a crazy life!
I really just have to summarize Thomas's entire life:
He was in a committed relationship with a male swan named Henry for 18-24 years before a female swan named Henrietta showed up and mated with Henry.
Thomas was initially jealous of the pair and attacked them, breaking 2 of the 5 eggs Henrietta had laid. However, once the remaining eggs hatched, Thomas warmed up to them and helped raise them.
Henry couldn't fly because of an injured wing, so Thomas taught the cygnets how to fly.
When they needed to reduce the goose population in the pond where Thomas and the swans lived, they dyed Thomas's feathers red so he wouldn't be separated from Henry.
Henry, Henrietta, and Thomas remained in their happy throuple for years and raised 68 cygnets before Henry died in 2009. After Henry's death, Henrietta found another swan and flew away, leaving Thomas alone.
Thomas finally met and mated with a female goose in 2011 and had his own babies. However, another goose named George stole them and raised them himself.
As Thomas grew elderly and blind, he was relocated to a wildlife center where he raised orphaned cygnets.
His caretaker at the center described him as "pretty high maintenance."
Thomas died in 2018 at the age of around 40. He had a funeral that included a small coffin and a procession that was led by a bagpiper. He was buried under the stone where Henry was buried, the two finally reunited in death.
Before and after his death, Thomas has been celebrated as an icon of the LGBTQ+ community for obvious reasons.
Putting the term "Catholic guilt" on a high shelf where fandom can't reach it until everyone learns how to identify characters who are very very clearly coded as Protestant.
This fawn and bobcat were found in an office together, cuddling under a desk after a forest fire
This caption is not actually correct, the fawn and bobcat were not found in an office together cuddling after a forest fire. The bobcat kitten was found first incredible dehydrated a week prior and then the 2009 Jesusita forest fire occurred and the rescue then had to deal with a huge flood of animals. Animal Rescue Team was saving as many animals as they could, but because of the massive number of animals they ran out of space and didn’t have any choice but to temporarily place the two together while they were running more rescues.
Usually, you would never house these two species together, but when in an emergency situation with literally nowhere else to put them, the rescue had to do it. Luckily for them, the 3 week old kitten and 3 day old fawn quickly bonded in their dire circumstance and several very cute photos were taken before the two were separated to be raised separately for release once the situation had cleared up and there was space for the fawn.
Learning the whole story also means that you get to find out that there are more photos!!
When the brain fog kicks in..

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watching youtube in the 18th century: goddddddd could you skip through the 20 minutes of thanks for your ~most gracious patron her grace the duchess of D--shire, a new maecenas & the loveliest of ladies~ and get to your handel tier listing
@falloutnewnobody
#yall in the 18th century are spoiled as fuck 15th century youtube SUCKS#yeah dedication to the patron of the work and the local nobility is one thing but imagine that PLUS a ten miniute prayer for the virgin#mother's intercession AND the fucking guild ads that play for half the fucking runtime#and dont even get me started on these “Raid” and “Clash of Clans” ads like I KNOW THE CLANS ARE RAIDING AND CLASHING dont remind me#like fucking hell im just switching back to the book of hours at this point
listening and learning, sorry </3
I'm a disability advocate (I think you should be disabled)
really though a lot of people put themselves through a lot of pain or inconvenience because they have decided they aren't Bad Enough to need help with something and it sucks. so I truly do want to encourage identifying as disabled. you can get a cane if you think you'd only use it on the really bad days or if the deciding factor is that it's your favorite color or if you think maybe it would make one single task a little easier. you can use a screen reader if it's more convenient to hear text spoken to you rather than reading it. you can get cut-proof gloves, or a chopping gizmo, or pre-cut ingredients if it would make you feel safer when cooking because you're a little clumsy. you can use a wheelchair if it would just make you less tired.
as someone who struggled (and struggles) with feeling Bad Enough to justify the tools I need: it's okay if you don't think you need them. A want is enough. A passing "oh, that would be useful" is enough, especially if it keeps happening. you're allowed to want things to be easier and you are allowed to make them easier. I love you.